Sunshine Kids in a Pod
by princess-katie
Summary: Things are going smoothly at the Nabootique: that's not normal, is it? Then Vince's sister turns up, and Howard can't help finding himself strangely attracted to her.
1. She's Genius!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

' Howard? '

Howard was standing behind the counter in Nabootique, rethinking Stationary Village, and trying very hard to ignore Vince. Vince was sitting down - as usual, Howard noted - and fiddling with the pink feather boa he was sporting.

' Howard? ' Vince repeated,' Howard ... Howard ... Howard ... Howard ... Howard ... '

Howard was ignoring him, and Vince showed no signs of giving in any time soon.

' Howard ... Howard ... Howard ... Howard! '

Howard sighed at his friend,' I've told you before Vince, I don't know anything about bananas _or _tarantula's eggs! '

' What're you on about? ' Vince frowned,' I was going to tell you that my sister's coming to see me next week. She's got a gap in her schedule which has my name written all over it. Well ... I haven't exactly broke it to Naboo yet, but it'll be cool ... '

' Your sister? ' Howard echoed - Howard had never met his friend's sister, and knew very little of her. He knew that Vince spoke of her in the highest terms, and that they were very close, but he knew little else.

' Yeah,' Vince grinned broadly,' great, isn't it? I haven't seen her in a few months - can't wait. You'll like her, Howard. Only, don't scare her with your jazz talk, will you, or I might not see her for months! '

' I have you know I'm smooth with the ladies,' Howard told Vince,' I'm Howard Moon, the ladies love me. '

' Yeah, right. Besides, I don't care how many ladies love you - my sister is the _one _woman who's off-limits' Vince warned.

Howard shot his friend an indignant glare, before asking,' What's she doing coming here, anyway? _You_ always go see _her_. '

It was true that Vince often disappeared for the day, with the excuse of going to visit his sister - although a day often turned into a week.

' Dunno,' shrugged the black haired man,' she rang up and said she needed to have a break from stuff. She doesn't really do much really - since college, she's just gone around until somewhere took her fancy. She was in Cardiff for ages with some mate, until her mate got married. '

' Where's she now then? '

' Newcastle,' Vince told him,' she's working in some bar. Old college friend works there and got her the job, so she's staying there for a bit. Wish she could have decided to stay somewhere closer to home, though. '

' Where's she going to sleep, anyway? ' Howard frowned.

Vince shrugged,' She can always share my room - she probably won't mind. '

' Yeah,' laughed Howard,' if she can stand the smell in that hovel. '

Vince didn't look too bothered,' We grew up in a forest - she doesn't care where she sleeps. We're children of the wilderness. Accostomed to the wild ways of nature.'

' You can't live for a few days, if you don't have your Ricky Sparks, or whatever they are,' Howard scoffed,' where would you put them in the wilderness? '

Vince rolled his eyes,' It's Nicky Clarke! Hottest you can get! '

Howard fiddled with the sellotape tree as a silence fell over the room. ' I can't believe you've never met my sister,' Vince said to cut through the silence - he hated silence,' we've been mates for ages! '

The other man shrugged,' Guess our paths weren't destined to cross until now. The stars and the cosmos have decided it's time.' Vince threw him a confused look. Howard shrugged and continued,' either that, or we'd left high school when she started, and we've been in a different place to her since. '

' Yeah, that,' Vince said with acceptance,' My little sister's coming here though! I can't wait to show her my wardrobe - she loves my clothes. Mainly because half of them are what I've nicked off her. Haven't seen her in months. Might be able to convince her to stay longer. '

' Is she much like you, Vince? ' asked Howard anxiously.

Vince grinned,' Two sunshine kids in a pod. 'Cept I'm 5 years older, and male. '

' Great,' Howard sighed,' another Vince.'

' She's genius! ' Vince cried.

The bell on the door tingled, and Naboo entered the shop followed by the faithful Bollo.

' Who's genius? ' Naboo asked, looking between the pair of them.

' Vince's little sister,' replied Howard,' who's coming to stay next week. '

Naboo threw Vince a sharp look,' You what? When did you clear this with me? '

Vince grinned at his friend,' Aw, c'mon Naboo. Holly's gorgeous - maybe I'll put a good word in with her for you. You could do with a woman in your life. '

Naboo shrugged,' Alright, cheers Vince,' he said, before leaving the two best friends alone together.

Howard narrowed his eyes at Vince,' You told me your sister was off-limits. How come she's suddenly fair game to Naboo? '

Vince grinned,' Because you can't stop my sister visiting, but Naboo could, if he felt like it. He's my landlord, and my boss! Besides, Holly's with some guy. '

They fell into a silence, until Vince broke it by adding,' Besides, she wouldn't be interested in either of you anyway. '


	2. Topshop's Got a Sale on!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

' Oh, no way,' Vince grinned the next day as he flicked through his magazine,' there's a sale on at top shop! '

Howard barely looked up from the poetry he was working on - it'd been ages since he'd produced any solid work. After the Zooniverse, it had been all about the music.

' Aw, 50% off over 100 items! This is genius! ' Vince exclaimed, pausing before asking, ' Don't suppose there's any chance of me nipping out for a bit? '

Howard supressed a sigh - this was Vince all over,' We're _both _supposed to be working. What if something happens - it gets really busy, or something? '

' I won't be long - just need a few things to spruce up the old wardrobe with,' Vince insisted, pulling his jacket on,' I'll be back soon. '

Howard didn't have time to say anything else before Vince had left the shop. Staring after his friend, he considered how much Vince annoyed him sometimes. And how much Vince got away with. He shook his head - it was just Vince; Vince was Vince, and they'd been a team since primary school.

It was nearly three hours later when Howard had finally thought of a second line which went well with the first line of his poem. He grinned triumphantly and re-read it several times, before sitting back and relaxing - surely that deserved a break.

He'd decided to try adding his third line, and had just returned to his piece of paper, when the bell on the door tinged.

_Ah, a customer, about time _Howard thought, looking up from the counter.

The person who'd just entered the shop, was a woman aged 25-30, Howard noted, straightening his hat and grinning. She looked like she'd raided Vince's wardrobe too, he thought.

She was short and slim, wearing a pair of black skinny jeans, with a red silken blouse which had shiny black studs down the middle. A familiar looking red hat with the same black studs sat on her head.

Howard watched as her head snapped from side to side; she scoured the room with her eyes, looking for something.

' Can I help you, Madam? ' he asked cautiously.

Her eyes were wide and fearful as she looked at him,' Vince? ' she said quickly,' is 'e 'ere? '

Howard frowned in confusion,' He's gone out for a bit - shouldn't be too long. Are you alright? ' he added, noting the way her face fell when he told her Vince wasn't around. Her eyes were still wide and her breathing was heavy.

' I just - ' she began,' I just really needed Vince. It's important. '

Howard wasn't sure how to deal with a stressing woman so just repeated,' He shouldn't be too long. '

' Oh God, I needed 'im _now,' _she sighed, throwing her hands up in the air, ' 'e's never around - I bet 'e's gone shopping or something, 'asn't 'e? Honestly, the minute there's a sale on anywhere, 'e's gone like a flash. '

' An accurate portrait of him,' Howard nodded,' maybe I can help you with something instead? Or you could stay until he gets back. I'm Howard, by the way, Howard Moon. '

A spark of recognition hit her eyes,' Oh - Howard? Vince talks about you all the time, Howard did this, Howard did that, Howard won't let me play Gary Numan in the car. ' She came closer to the counter - closer to Howard - and became more relaxed - whatever had been bothering her a moment ago was now forgotten - easily distracted, like someone else he could think of.

Howard noticed that once she'd calmed down a bit, she was rather pretty. Then he began to wonder how she knew Vince so well, when _he'd _no idea who she was. Then it hit him.

' You're Vince's sister, aren't you? ' he asked.

She grinned broadly,' Sure am - didn't I introduce myself? God, I'm so ditzy. Anyway - so this is where you both work? Looks quite cool,' she was distracted by looking around and her eye was caught by something nearby. She picked up the leopard print jacket and grinned,' this is way cool! River Island had one like this last month, but it was way too much. '

Howard shook his head to himself. How could he not have realised who she was, the minute she came into the room - she was so much like Vince, it was unbelieveable.

She seemed to think about the same things - she spoke in the same way, with the same hand gestures. She had the same sort of dress sense - in fact, he was certain that the hat actually belonged to Vince.

Suddenly, she looked over her shoulder at him,' You're thinking about me and Vince aren't you? '

' How'd you know? ' he asked, raising his eyebrows.

She shrugged as she pulled out the jacket and slipped into it,' Everyone always says how much we look like each other, and you 'aven't yet, so it's only a matter of time. '

Howard couldn't help but smile,' Well, now that you mention it. '

She turned away from him, admiring the jacket in a nearby mirror. He took the chance to picture her face alongside Vince's in his mind. Their hair was the same colour, though Holly's was a sleek bob compared to Vince's longer mane. They had the same pale skin. The same doe-like bright blue eyes, and the same angular nose.

' What brings you here, anyway? ' Howard asked,' Vince said you weren't coming 'til next week? '

She pulled off the jacket and tossed it to one side,' Just needed to get away. I needed to leave Newcastle sooner than I thought I would. And I'm counting on Vince to make it all better. That's what Vince does - when things aren't going right, Vince comes in and makes it all better for me. '

As if on cue, the door swung open and Vince sauntered in, carrying several bags.

' Vince! ' his sister exclaimed.

Vince looked up in suprise and dropped the bags. ' Holly! ' he yelled, holding out his arms, and closing them tightly around her when she ran into them. He kissed her cheek and she tightened her grip on him, resting her head against the place where his neck met his shoulder.

Vince looked down at her, when it became apparent that she didn't want to let go of him. ' Um ... Holly? ' he asked, looking down at her. ' Holly? '

Holly mumbled against him,' I'm in trouble Vince. '


	3. Don'tDo Touch Me

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

_Holly mumbled against his chest,' I'm in trouble Vince. '_

Vince rested his hands on her forearms and held her at arms-length,' What d'you mean, trouble? What sort of trouble? '

Holly sighed,' I don't know what to do; if ... if ... oh god, Vince. '

' Hey,' frowned her elder brother - Holly being 27, and Vince 32,' what is it? '

She sniffed - the panicky wide-eyed girl Howard had seen first enter the shop was back,' I just need you to be here for me - he's gonna come and get me - you've got to help me. '

' Holly! ' Vince hissed,' calm down, will you? This isn't like you. Look, let's go upstairs and talk about this, eh? ' he didn't wait for an answer before continuing,' c'mon - I bet it's not as bad as you think. '

' You'd be suprised,' she said darkly.

Briefly, Howard was reminded of the time that Vince had come into the shop very upset - Howard had been genuinely worried, until he found out that Vince's sorrow was because someone had copied his clothes. He hoped this wasn't a similar situation.

As Vince placed a hand in the small of Holly's back and guided her towards the door which led from the shop to the flat upstairs, he looked over his shoulder at Howard, and then back to Holly.

He paused before asking his sister,' D'you think Howard should maybe come too? Only, if you need help, I'm not much good at plans. Howard always comes up with the plans. '

Howard didn't expect her to agree - why would she want someone she didn't even know to listen to her problems?

Holly didn't consider this properly - all she knew was she needed help, and quite frankly at this stage it didn't matter who from. And Howard had seemed nice enough when they spoke before Vince's arrival.

' Yeah,' she nodded,' if Howard doesn't mind, that it,' she added, her eyes meeting his.

' I'd - I wouldn't mind,' Howard assured her, heading for the door and turning the sign on the door from OPEN to CLOSED.

The three of them walked upstairs, and Vince went straight into the living room, telling his sister to sit down. She sat besides him on the sofa, and Howard sat down opposite the siblings.

' C'mon then,' Vince said,' what's up? '

' So, um, I've been in Newcastle a few months right, and everything's been going fine - you know that,' Holly told him,' but ... um ... my mate, who got me the job and who I've been living with, she's going out with the guy who runs the bar. Things got back - he's not a nice guy. '

' What did he do? ' demanded Vince at once,' if he did anything to you ... '

' Easy, little man,' Howard frowned,' maybe you should listen to the story, eh? '

Vince obeyed his friend and sat down, looking back at his sister, whose face was pained, as her bright blue eyes glassed over. She was staring at one spot on the carpet as she spoke.

' He was controlling from the beginning - but it's your boss, you don't question it, do you? Jus' did as I was told and got on with it. But he was staying at our flat more and more too, and he was trying to control things there too. He hit her sometimes. '

' He didn't hit you? ' Vince asked, as her eyes welled up with tears

Holly sniffed, wiping a stray tear on the back of his hand,' Not at first. He wasn't very nice, but he never touched me. But then I did something really stupid ... I maxed out three credit card - owed a lot of money and didn't have the money to pay it off. '

' Tell me you didn't . . . ' her brother began, shaking his head.

' I did,' Holly told him, more tears following as she told him,' He lent me the money, but then he got really nasty. He demanded it back straight away - I didn't have the money and none of the girls working in the bar could help me out either. They were all terrified of him too. When I couldn't pay it back soon as, he got violent. '

She shuddered and more tears fell. Wincing, she tried to wipe them away with her hand again, only for more to fall,' He said I should take on an extra job, to earn more money to pay it off. He wanted me to work as a _dancer. '_

Vince grinned,' You've always been a good dancer. '

' Vince, I don't think she means actually dancing,' Howard said quietly as Holly rubbed her arms, hugging them to herself.

' _Exotic dancing_,' she told him.

' Oh,' he nodded in understanding,' you mean, like latin dancing or something? Samba? Salsa? '

' _Vince,' _she sighed in exasperation,' he wanted me to be a _lap-dancer! _Then he asked me to be a _hooker! '_

' No! ' Vince cried,' tell me you didn't?! '

' Course I didn't! ' she replied indignantly, her tears stopping in favour of anger and bitterness,' and when I told him that, he battered me. It was last night, so this morning I waited until I knew him and my mate wouldn't be around, and I packed everything up, threw it in the car and left. I didn't know where else to go - and since I was coming next week, anyway . . . '

' Oh, Holly,' Vince sighed, wrapping an arm around her shoulders,' you were meant to be the smart one - how could you get yourself in this trouble? '

' Please, Vince,' she sighed, leaning into his touch,' I know I've been an idiot, but I need you. I owe him tens of thousands of pounds, and I don't know anyone who has that sort of money. If he comes after me, I'm done for. He doesn't know I've gone, but he'll know within a few hours. He's seeing my mate, for god's sake - what if she tells him I've a brother in London? He might track me down! '

Vince sighed - he had to look after Holly. It was the last thing their father had said to him before he died. The car crashed, and whilst Mrs Noir died on impact, Mr Noir survived until the ambulance got there. He told his 6 year old son to look after his 1 year old sister and that was that. Bryan had always been telling him to watch over her, when they were growing up in the forest too. He hated seeing her down - she was hardly ever down. He loved her, he had to do something.

' You're staying here,' Vince said, squeezeing her close,' you'll stay here for as long as you want. Your things're in your car? Your car's outside somewhere? '

She nodded,' But what if he shows up? How do I pay him back? '

Howard cleared his throat,' He probably won't find you here - your friend wouldn't sell you out, and even if she did, London's a big place. If it comes to the worst, and he gets here - well, he don't have the money either, but Naboo could probably come up with something to make it go away. '

' Naboo? ' asked Holly quietly.

' He's a shaman,' Howard added,' owns the shop. And this flat - good mate of ours.'

' Howard's right, Holly,' Vince added, thankful that his friend was quick at thinking up the right things to say in the right situations,' Now, shall we go get your things from the car? ' he suggested, getting up.

' This .. Naboo .. won't mind me staying here? I won't get you into trouble? '

' Course not,' Vince insisted, pausing at the door, ' he's a good guy - shaman - thing. '

His sister hugged him again,' Thanks Vince - I knew I could count on you. '

To the suprise of both men, she turned to Howard too and added,' You too. Thanks.'

He didn't get chance to reply before she was standing right in front of him, and she outstretched her arms, hugging him as she had Vince.

Vince smirked to himself and waited for Howard's _Don't touch me, _but it didn't come. Instead he stood there awkwardly, but not awkard enough to tell her not to touch him, and waited until she let go. When she pulled away, her hands were on his shoulders,' I don't bite, you know,' she told him, before removing her hands and following Vince down the staircase, leaving Howard behind to ponder this mysterious woman.

It took him a full minute to realise that she'd just hugged him, and he'd stood there like a statue. She must have thought he was an idiot. Not that he cared what she thought, of course. She was just Vince's sister. Why should he act any differently towards her than he did Vince? She was just some girl he'd met that afternoon.

_' Yeah ' _said the niggling voice in the back of his mind,' _but you never let Vince touch you, do you?' _

_'Shut up,' he told himself,' I was hardly going to push her off was I? She was upset and all that. '_

_' Whatever,' the little voice said, ' just make sure you keep an eye on this one, will you? You've hardly got an excellent track record, Sir. ' _

' _Hey! I'll have you know I've brilliant record. Howard Moon is a chick magnet, Sir! ' he told himself._

' Howard! '

It was Vince, standing at the bottom of the stairs, and sounding none too pleased.

' Howard! Are you gonna help us carry this stuff in? She's got almost as many clothes as I do! '


	4. This Tie Like Rambo!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Holly dumped a small black suitcase in the middle of the living room, and smiled gratefully and Howard heaved the heavier pink one into the room.

' There,' she said, grinning at him as he panted for breath,' last of them.'

' And it's all clothes? ' he panted.

She shrugged in an offhand manner,' Those four cases are - the rucksacks are just full of random stuff. I travel, remember - I try not to have too much stuff. '

' Becuase four cases of clothes isn't too much? '

' Course not! ' Vince called from his room - after bringing in two small rucksacks, he'd decided he'd had enough of carrying things around.

' Before I left college, I'd have filled 6 or 7, but when I went travelling I had to get rid of some. No way would it have fit in the car. Gave a lot of it to Vince,' she told him,' now, where am I staying? '

Howard chewed on his lower lip,' Well, I didn't think it was a good idea, but Vince says you can stay in his room. ' Howard knew Vince could be difficult to share with, but Holly didn't seem to share his opinion.

' Great! Vince is loads of fun to share with,' she told him,' and quite frankly, I don't care where I sleep - I'm here, aren't I? It's got to be better than where I've just come from. '

' Shall I stick the kettle on? ' Howard asked her, feeling quite nervous, before telling himself to get a grip - she was a new flatmate, and it was a cup of tea, for god's sake.

' Mmmn yeah, I'm parched,' she nodded, pulling the brim of her hat down,' coffee, about three sugars. Unless you've got anything stronger? I wouldn't mind a Bailey's, or something. '

Howard, now in the kitchen, almost dropped the mug he was holding,' I'm afraid there is no Bailey's,' he told her stiffly, as he dug around for another mug. Ugh. Bailey's was a reminder of Gregg, and he did _not _need that.

As Howard stood in the kitchen, adding sugar to two mugs, Holly watched him from the living room. Vince had told her a lot about Howard, but what he'd mainy said, was that Howard was, whilst his best friend, his polar opposite. Which meant that Howard was Holly's opposite too, but they were getting on well enough.

Howard was sweet, she thought. He'd been nice and polite from her first entrance in the shop and he had an awkward way and lack of confidence which was quite funny.

He was kinda odd looking too - small eyes, a barely formed mustache and a loud shirt which didn't match the rest of his outfit. Added to his awkward smile, it was oddly endearing, she concluded.

And now he was calling her name.

' Sorry,' she smiled, jerking out of her reviere and accepting the mug of coffee from him,' cheers. '

He perched on the edge of the sofa, whilst she sat on the coffee table, knees tucked up to her chest.

' So,' Howard said as she sipped her drink,' what d'you make of jazz music - jazz fusion? '

Holly shrugged,' 'S'not my favourite kind of music, but I'll listen to anything. I like some of the earlier influences, but I can't do with jazz-metal and jazz-pop and all this stuff. '

' You better not like _any _jazz! ' shouted Vince from his room.

Holly rolled her eyes and got up, shutting the living room door loudly. She grinned back at Howard,' There we are - no more from him now. D'you ever wish he'd just shut up? '

Howard made a non-comittal jerk of the head,' Gotten used to him, by now to be honest. I've learned it's easier to just ignore him sometimes. '

' Yeah,' agreed Holly,' I try too, but he's all smily and optimistic. All child-like - he's just adorable sometimes, how d'you ignore someone like that? '

Howard couldn't help thinking that Holly was equally smiling and optimistic, but said nothing. She cleared her throat and said,' Enough about Vince anyway - I know plenty about Vince, after all. What about you, Howard? '

' What about me? ' he frowned.

' Well, I don't know,' she shrugged,' tell me something. Anything . . . '

He nodded,' Alright then. Once, when I was about - '

He was cut off by the door swinging open and Vince standing there, hands on hips. ' Are you bringing all this stuff through, or not? Because I need you to help me make room in my wardrobes. And I want to look through your stuff - I need a new belt. '

Howard gritted his teeth together,' Vince! we were trying to have a conversation here. '

His friend pulled a face,' So what? You can do that later, can't you? She's not going anywhere anytime soon.'

Holly drained the rest of her coffee and put the mug down', In a bit, Howard,' she shrugged, grabbing some of her cases as Vince dragged the others into his room.

It took them half an hour to locate the camp bed from the attic and assemble it in the corner of the room. Then they unpacked all of Holly's clothes and laid them in big piles on the carpet.

As Vince's hands eagerly scoured his sister's belongings, she was just as quick to search his things.

' Holly, these boots are genius! ' Vince declared, picking up a pair of white cowboy boots,' what size are your feet? '

' 6,' she replied.

He moaned,' Aw, I'm an 8 - maybe I could squeeze . . . I've got a jacket these would well match! '

' You mean this? ' Holly asked, pulling an item of clothing out of the wardrobe - it was a white jacket with a few blue sequined stars on the front, and fringing down the middle. She slipped it on and looked in the mirror,' Hmmm, I like it. '

The clothes didn't get put away as soon as intended; instead, they were trying on each others things.

Vince picked out a bright pink t-shirt with purple and blue blotches across it,' Tie-dye. I like it. '

' You still have this tie! ' Holly cried, holding up an old school tie to her forehead,' like Rambo! '

Vince was enjoying looking through his sister's clothes, and vice versa. They both owned some of the strangest things. Including what Vince currently held up.

' A cape? Were you trying to pull off the serial killer look? ' he demanded with a laugh.

' You've got a few capes!' Holly pointed out.

He shrugged,' Yeah, but black with a skull on? Mine are all cool - shiny and glittery and stuff. '

' Shut up,' Holly frowned,' I went through a gothic phase, alright? '

They went back to looking through each others clothes and picking out all sorts, poking fun and telling each other what needed to be gotten rid of - even though neither of them would get rid of anything.

Holly held up Vince's faithful silver mirrorball suit and laughed,' As if you still have this thing! You got this when you were about 20! Oh my god, this belt! ' she cried, attention grabbed by something else,' it matches my hat.

Indeed the red belt with its black studs did match the hat she wore. Vince frowned at her and grabbed the hat off her head,' That's because this is _my _hat. My hat - my belt - matching stuff, see? '

' Hey! ' protested Holly, jumping up to try and snatch it back,' Vince! This is bullying! '

Vince held it up higher and with his other hand, held her head away from him. She fought off his hand and laughed, jumping up.

Soon, it was no longer about the hat - they were just messing about now. Vince stuck out his tounge and Holly grabbed his arm, pulling him closer to her. He stumbled in his platform boots and they both staggered and ended up on the floor.

There was a pause as they lay spread on their backs. Holly looked at Vince and the silence was broken by them both bursting into uncontrollable laughter. They laughed and laughed until they were out of breath and their stomach and cheeks hurt.

Holly rolled over onto her stomach and picked up the hat from where her brother had dropped it on the carpet. She jammed it on her head and stuck her tounge out at him.

He began laughing again and it was infectious. She was laughing like a maniac again, when she looked away from her brother and her eyes fell on the doorway.

An large hulking ape and a short man with long dark hair and blue robes stood watching them.

Vince rolled over and stop laughing at once when he saw the pair.

' Ah,' Vince said,' Naboo ... there was something I had to ask you ... '


	5. An Ape? And a Wizard?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Holly watched as the small man in his robes and turban crossed his arms over his chest an regarded she and Vince.

' You live with an ape? And a - a wizard? ' Holly demanded as Vicne scrambled to his feet and offered her a hand.

She took his hand and he pulled her to her feet,' Naboo's a _shaman_,' Vince told her,' I told you about him, remember. And Bollo's Naboo's familiar.'

' Bollo seeing double,' the ape grunted.

Holly took a step backwards,' It - it _talks? ' _she demanded,' I mean - I know some animals do - Jahoolio the tiger did, Chunto the deaf horse, the animals from the jungle. '

' They all talk,' Vince told her,' and Bollo's genius! '

The ape - Bollo, apparently - looked between the brother and sister, and then at Naboo,' Bollo need glasses? '

Naboo shook his head, looking at Holly - the dark hair, bright blue eyes, distinctive nose, pale skin and unique dress sense. ' Nah, Bollo. Your sister, Vince? '

Holly smiled nervously,' Holly Noir. Pleased to meet you. '

Naboo raised his eyebrows at Vince,' Thought she was coming next week? '

Vince looked at his sister with a smile, and looked at the shaman with a sheepish expression,' See, the thing is, she really needs somewhere to stay. She's my sister - I've to to look after her, haven't I? '

' Bollo hungry,' Bollo grumbled, ' Bollo go see if there are any kit-kats left. '

As Bollo left, Naboo - Vince's boss and landlord, as well as friend - looked at Vince with an expression of annoyance,' You said she was going to stay here a week,' he reminded Vince.

Vince shrugged as Holly stood there awkwardly,' C'mon Naboo. She needs somewhere and I'm her best bet. Why can't she move in here? '

' We don't really have enough room,' Naboo pointed out,' it's cramped enough with the four of us here. I had to enchant it to make it bigger, remember, I added that extra bedroom. It's gonna be well packed if we have someone else living here. '

' She doesn't mind sharing my room,' Vince pleaded,' and I don't mind. She'll be no trouble. '

' Vince! ' Naboo groaned,' you can't invite everyone to stay here. How d'you expect us to fit into here? And what about the extra food we'll need? '

' She's not just anyone. And you agreed to let her stay, last night! '

' Yeah, when I thought it was for a week! '

Holly sighed, running a hand through her hair,' Vince, don't worry about it,' she told him, grabbing his arm,' if your friend's not happy about it, I don't want to cause trouble. '

' Don't be stupid, where're you going to go? ' he demanded,' what if he finds you? Something really bad might happen. At least if you're here, I can keep an eye on you! '

' Vince,' she said softly,' I could try a few old college friends. I haven't spoken to most of them in ages, but I dunno, someone might put me up for a bit. '

Her brother sighed in despair and wrapped his arms around her,' For god's sake, I just got you back,' he muttered.

' I know,' she said sadly as they broke apart,' and thanks for trying for me,' she added, reaching up to kiss his cheek.

Naboo sighed, shaking his head,' Alright, alright, she can stay! '

Vince grinned whilst Holly turned to the shaman with wide eyes,' Really? ' they chorused.

Naboo rolled his eyes,' You're making me feel like the bad guy, with all your hugging and tragic goodbyes. Holly, was it? Holly, you can stay, but I want rent just like Vince and Howard have to pay. You can work downstairs in the shop if you've no other way of earning money. As for the space, we'll make do, won't we? '

' Oh God, thank you,' she beamed,' thanks a lot! I'll be no trouble, I promise.'

Naboo shrugged,' You can't possibly be any more trouble than a DJing ape, a jazz fanatic and the king of the mods. '


	6. It was your job, Sir!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

A month later, and it was like Holly had always been there. Holly's worries seemed to have disappeared after her friend called her to say that she'd also left Newcastle, and her evil boyfriend.

She'd just fitted into the ways of the three men and the gorilla easily. Bollo - devoted to Naboo and fond of Vince - had become quite fond of Holly too. Naboo, Holly had found, was quite quite and left to his own devices but he was a nice enough guy - so long as you didn't touch his stuff.

Sharing Vince's room proved quite easy when she wanted someone to talk to at night, or she wanted to nick some of this clothes - although it meant that their clothes were mixed up and it was hard to tell whom some of the things belonged to anyway.

Working in the shop was fun too. She was in the shop right now, sitting on the edge of the counter swinging her legs back and forth and waiting for a customer. She watched as Vince customised a pair of boots with sequins, and Howard rearranged the jazz records. It was easy to pass all day with the two men. Then all evening.

Vince, of course, she got on well with anyway and could easily spend a day with. And she was getting to know Howard a lot more too.

He wasn't as loud and confident as herself or Vince. He didn't understand the need to accessorize everything. He thought Holly watched a load of rubbish on the t.v, and on the outside they had nothing in common. Then she got to know him, and he was smart, rather funny, and sweet. They could sit for ages just talking, whilst Vince was doing other stuff. Of course, he was hopeless and awkward, but surely friends could overlook that?

Although, she couldn't help wondering if he was only nice to her because Vince was his best friend.

***

Howard was rearranging the jazz records whilst they waited for a customer. Vince was messing about with some glitter or something, and Holly was sitting on the counter - a spot which had quickly become her favourite.

Howard's eyes kept flitting across the room and resting on Holly for a few moments.

Where he'd initially thought that Holly was just like Vince, but after spending a month with her, he noticed if you payed close enough attention - which Howard did - she was actually quite different.

For one, she'd dyed her hair a warm brown now, having decided that black made her look even paler than she actually was. Her eyes may be identical to Vince's, but Howard couldn't help but think that there was a different shine to them. She didn't have the same smile either - he was sure that whilst Vince's smile was sunny and nice enough, Holly's shone, and lit up the room.

And whilst Vince was very vain, Holly wasn't so much. Sure she cared about her appearance, but she wasn't quite as obsessive as her brother. She wasn't as shallow either, he thought; at least, she didn't nag him about what he wore, and she didn't nag at him to find a girlfriend like Vince did.

She had a softer side than Vince did too, he thought. Vince glossed over it when Howard was down, but Holly smiled that warm smile, made him a drink and asked him what was wrong.

Whatever he thought about her, he was sure that Holly would be a perfect fit for him - he was dark, brooding and poetic; she was warm, bright and eternally happy.

' Hey Howard,' Vince said from across the shop,' is everything set for tonight? ' Tonight they had a gig at the Velvet Onion, and were looking forward to it - they loved the Velvet Onion.

Howard didn't look up, instead just going,' Hmmm. '

' You picked up the costumes from the dry cleaners, right? ' Vince added.

That made him look up,' What? That was _your _job! You always look after the clothes. '

' You said you'd do it,' moaned Vince,' dry cleaner'll be closing in an hour. '

Howard gritted his teeth in annoyance, ' That's not my problem. It was your job, Sir! '

' Was not! '

'It was, I know it! '

' Howard! Don't argue, juust go! '

' You go! '

Holly broke the tension by bursting into laughter.

' What? ' the two men demanded in unison.

She grinned cheekily,' I picked it up yesterday - my jacket was in there anyway, so I got your stuff while I was there. I knew Vince would forget - yes Vince it _was _your job. '

' Oh, now that you mention it, it _was _meant to be me,' Vince nodded,' Oh well cheers, sis. What would we do without her, eh Howard? '

Howard gave Holly a weak smile,' We'd be lost. '

' You're coming to the Velvet Onion tonight, right? ' Vince asked her happily.

' Course I am,' she told her brother with cheer,' I wouldn't miss it - I haven't seen you two play together before, have I? Got to support my boys, haven't I? '

It took Howard almost a full minute to register what she'd said. _My Boys. _Vince was her brother, he was just her friend. But she'd called him _hers. _

_Woah now _he told himself _you're reading too much into it - it was just a passing comment_

***

Later that night, Holly found herself sat at a table in the middle of the Velvet Onion along with Naboo and Bollo.

The club was filled with young-ish people mostly, and they were all dressed in wild, outlandish clothes and had brightly coloured hair. They were cheering and calling out for the 'Mighty Boosh' - apparently what Vince and Howard had called themselves.

' Are they any good? ' Holly asked Naboo.

Naboo shrugged,' They're alright, I guess. Can't really remember. Had a bit too much of Leroy's gear last time I came to watch them.'

The lights went down, and the spotlight rose over the stage, illuminating Vince at the microphone and Howard behind a huge keyboard, also with a microphone. They were dressed in silver sailor suits and were singing their future sailor set whiuch they'd tried to do once before, but failed thanks to the stupid Lance Dior and Harold Boon.

They weren't on stage for too long but their set was successful. They had a new edge which Holly hadn't seen many people do before, and everyone in the crowd was loving it.

When they were done she cheered and clapped loudly. Howard accepting the applause for only a few moments before leaving the stage, wheras Vince stayed a while longer cheering back and shouting out to the crowd.

Holly beamed when Howard approached she, Naboo and Bollo, and she found herself standing up to greet him

' What did you think? ' he asked. He seemed to be asking them all, but his eyes were fixed solely on Holly.

' That was so cool,' she grinned,' you were really good - well done! '

Howard was suprised when she threw herself forwards and hugged him in congratulation

' Woah there, Sunshine kid,' he laughed.

' Sunshine,' she said against him, as if testing it out,' I quite like it. ' Howard was suprised suprised she was hugging him again, mostly. After the day she'd arrived, she'd never hugged him. She'd touch his arm lightly sometimes when they were talking, but she'd not hugged him again.

At first, he was just standing there, like he had done the other time, but then Bollo grunted behind Holly's back and stuck out his arms, miming hugging someone. Howard got the message, and looked down at the girl with her arms around him, slowly lifting his own arms and encircling her waist. He rested his chin on the top of her head and decided that her hair had quite a nice smell to it.

Holly pulled away after what she deemed to be a suitable amount of time and though Howard lifted his chin from her head, his arms remained. Holly looked down at the hands holding her hips and looked pointedly at Howard.

Howard smiled at her and she couldn't help but smile back, but he didn't get her message and was still holding her.

' Um ... Howard? ' she asked, looking at his hands again.

This time he groaned,' Oh right ... um, sorry, I was just - I was miles away,' he told her, letting go at once.

She shrugged,' Not that I minded much, but I could just do with a drink. '

He stared after her as she went to the bar - _Not that she minded much - _was she trying to tell him something? No, she was just being friendly. Wasn't she? She had to be - she'd hardly be interested in him, after all.

_She's going to think I'm an idiot if I don't stop getting all shy and awkward around her. _

Holly leant against the bar, waiting for the barman to get to her. God, why did she have to keep making these little comments to him - _Sunshine, yeah I quite like that. Not that I mind much. God, he's gonna think that I like him. Which I don't. Do I? Don' t be stupid - course I don't. Not that it matters anyway. _

_He's gonna think I'm an idiot if I keeping mkaing my stupid little comments and then dashing off to do somthing else._


	7. Alabaster Retard

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

The Mighty Boosh

They got home from the Velvet Onion about mid-night.

Vince had spent all night chatting to pretty girls before deciding that he didn't like any of them anyway. Naboo and Bollo sat at the same table all night, just talking. Holly had starting talking to a fairly good looking man at the bar, but somehow she decided that she'd rather spend the night with her friends. Mostly, talking to Howard.

She'd tried to get him to dance, but he absolutely refused. in the end, she agreed to let it go, tellling him that she'd get her way next time they came to the club.

' Bollo go to bed,' Bollo declared once they all got back to the flat.

' I think we all are,' Naboo agreed, bidding the others goodnight and disappearing into his room.

' Night Howard,' Vince said cheerily going into his room and leaving the door open for his sister.

Holly bit her lower lip and looked at Howard. They stood for a moment in silence, beofre they both started at the same time.

' Well - '

' I suppose - '

They both stopped abruptly and laughed nervously.

Holly looking at Howard and, quite sure that he wasn't going to be the one to say anything, said,' You know, I was thinking tonight. About you, and about Vince. '

' Yeah? ' Howard asked, waiting to see what she was going to say.

She smiled, the sparkle in her eyes shining at him,' Vince stays on the stage and milks all the applause and stuff, but you just ... you just play your set and get on with it. You shouldn't let him take all the credit, Howard. '

Howard shrugged,' That's just how it goes. '

Holly shook her head, her hair falling over one eye as she did so,' I'll bet you're the genius behind all the songs, aren't you? Vince was never particularly musical - sure he can sing, but I'll bet you write all the music, don't you? '

Howard blushed and cursed himself inwardly - blushing? _Blushing? _That's just ridiculous,' Well I - I'll admit I've always had talents as a writer. I can really get into the minds of all kinds of characters - even like serial killers. It's not so hard to relate to a serial killer as you might think it is - I mean, we've all killed in our minds, haven't we? '

' Howard,' Holly said quietly,' you're rambling. '

He closed his mouth,' Right. Sorry. '

She smiled,' I was just going to say that you shouldn't let Vince always overshadow you. You're worth more than you think you are. People aren't always _just _interested in Vince ... '

Howard shrugged,' They are mostly. '

' No,' Holly insisted,' _I'm _not just interested in Vince, after all ... I think you're every bit as great as Vince is. Don't let him hog all the glory, yeah? '

Howard was slack jawed as he listened - she was telling him how he was great. Was this for real? He quickly closed his mouth, realising he must look utterly gormless and looked back at her properly.

' G'night Howard,' she smiled, before turning away and entering the bedroom.

' Night,' Howard called after her before entering his own bedroom. He leant against the door and closed his eyes. Holly Noir had him completly under her spell.

***

Holly was still awake an hour later. Vince had gone straight to sleep, so she was just laying there waiting for sleep to claim her.

It wasn't happening anytime soon though, as it seemed.

She tried laying on this side, then on that side, then her back, then her stomach, and curled up in a ball and sprawled out, and everything. Nothing; it just wasn't working.

Her mind was spinning with thoughts - mainly of the same variety; Howard Moon. He was so nice that she was now certain he wasn't just being nice because of Vince. No way - it was because he actually liked her. And she knew she liked him. Though how much, it was difficult to say.

He wasn't like anyone else. She'd never had a proper relationship and there's never been any man she'd had the feeling for - the feelings she had for him.

God, what was she going to do? She couldn't have a thing for Howard - that was so bizarre. No they were just really good friends.

He was a really good friend who happened to make her skin tingle when she brushed past him, and her stomach lurch when he smiled, and her cheeks flush when he looked at her for just a second too long.

Who was she kidding? She knew what these feelings were. And she knew it meant Howard Moon had captured her heart.

Deciding she needed to clear her head, she threw the covers back and left the room as quietly as she could - though Vince could sleep through a hurricane, so it wasn't very neccesary.

She went up into the attic, which was mostly full of old clothes of Vince's, a few old instruments and big ornate chests with heavy locks on, which belonged to Naboo.

She pushed up on the little square window and when it was open far enough, grabbed the sides of the hole with her hands and hauled herself out, so she was on the roof. Once out there, she scrambled to the very top of the roof and sat onto of the slate tiles.

Sitting out on this roof had been something she'd first done a few days after her arrival. She was still worried that _he _might come after her, and Vince had showed her what _he _did when he wanted to get away. He'd led her out onto the roof and held his hands out to the sky and the vast view of Dalston, telling her it was the best place to get away - after all, the only people who'd ever be on the roof were he, her, occasionally Howard, and even more occasionally Naboo. But probably not Bollo, who was scared he might fall off.

One knee tucked up to her chest, and her chin resting on that knee, she looked up to the starry night sky.

The full moon was out and was shining down.

Holly liked The Moon. The Moon wasn't what most people thought it was - everyone thought it was just some big round thing in the sky. Holly however, had heard it talk - Yeah. Talk. The Moon had spoken to her one night about a year ago and since then she'd sometimes tried to talk back to it.

' Dammed Howard,' she sighed, closing her eyes,' this is all down to him. I wouldn't feel like this if he wasn't so ... so Howard. He's made all this happen to me - he's got me under some kinda spell. ' she paused and opened her eyes, looking up at the moon,' I bet you've never had these problems, have you? '

The blank moon seemed to spin around, and the other side of it had bright blue eyes, a sharp nose and big pink lips.

' I'm The Moon,' it grinned.

' I know,' Holly smiled,' It's me - Holly Noir, remember? Sorry it's been a while, I've been busy ... '

' Ah, my friend, the little earth girl. When you are the Moon, you do not get busy,' the Moon told her, grinning. She liked the Moon's grin - it was like a young child, it was quite cute, actually,' you spend all your time hanging around. '

Holly nodded,' Yeah. I bet it's alright been the Moon, isn't it? You don't have to worry about stuff like this. '

The Moon - who she fondly thought of as an alabaster retard - told her,' I - I liked someone once. She .. uh .. wasn't bothered. '

' Really? ' Holly asked,' that's a shame - you're quite funny. '

The Moon grinned,' Ha. I am The Moon. You're not The Moon. It was Venus - I used to shout 'Hey Venus. Venus, it's me - the Moon.' Ha ha. Venus preferred Mars, in the end. '

' Oh. '

' Mars isn't so great,' the Moon said,' he's just big and red. Bit like Jupiter. Jupiter's jealous of me, because I've got a song, and he ain't. '

Holly nodded,' It's good to have a song sometimes. '

' I've got a song for you, little earth girl,' the Moon told her before singing softly,' All you need is love ... all you need is love ... all you need is love, love ... yeah, love is all you need. '

Holly smiled,' Cheers. '

The Moon grinned the widest of grins and turned back around.

Holly sighed when it had gone - nice song, but it didn't make her feel any better. In fact, it made her feel worse about things - if a being as child-like as the moon was telling her love was important, then what was it coming to?

Becuase that's what it was - love. And according to the moon, that was what she needed. Which meant she needed Howard.

Yes, Howard Moon had her completely under his spell.


	8. You and Your Bubbles!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**Hehe, some fluff in this one. I couldn't resist. **

The Mighty Boosh

Holly woke the next morning at 10am, because Vince was banging around the room, apparently looking for something. She groaned and rubbed her eyes, sitting up slowly, looking at him in annoyance.

' What're you doing? ' she groaned,' it's Sunday! When normal people sleep in! '

Vince grinned, turning around from where he was rifling through the wardrobe,' Ah, morning Holly. ' And without another word he turned bck to the wardrobe.

' Looking for something? ' she asked.

' Got it,' he announced, triumphantly holding up a bright blue trilby hat.

' Hey! That's mine,' she protested, clambering out of bed and very nearly falling over.

' Can't I borrow it? It matches the outfit,' he pointed out.

Holly regarded him a moment, before shaking her head,' No - it doesn't. You've got green pants and a red shirt! You look like a christmas tree! '

' Hey! I'm reliably informed that the mis-matched look is coming back in! Besides, I'm off out with Leroy today, and I wanna look cool - he's gonna take me to meet some hot girls he knows. '

' Well you're not having my hat - I want to wear it today! ' Holly said, plucking it from his unsuspecting fingers.

' What? ' Vince frowned,' you haven't even got dressed - how d'you know what hat's gonna go with your clothes? '

' I don't,' Holly admitted, twirling the hat around on her finger,' but I just really like this hat - you _know _I have a things for hats right now. '

Vince stuck his tounge out at her and huffed,' Fine. I'll just wear my boring black hat. '

' Great,' Holly nodded, jamming the vivid blue har on her head and laying back down in her bed.

She layed awake for a while, before telling herself that she might as well get up since she wasn't going to get any more sleep now.

She got up and washed and dressed quickly, jeans and a t-shirt, but was sure to put the hat on - it wasn't that she had particularly wanted to wear it, but she'd wanted to annoy Vince - he always borrowed her stuff, and she never got a lot of it back. At least _she _return _his _stuff ... most of the time.

When she entered the kitchen, Naboo and Bollo were playing cards in the living room, Vince was buttoning his jacket up, ready to leave and Howard was reading the paper at the table.

' Hey guys,' she said as she entered the kitchen.

Naboo looked up briefly and muttered,' Hey,' whilst Bollo nodded at her. Vince didn't acknowledge her, having already seen her today. Rolling her eyes at their lack of response, she crossed from the living room to the kitchen.

' Morning Holly,' Howard said quickly as she passed him. Immediately, he cursed himself for being so eager. However, she didn't seem to notice, he thought thankfully.

' Hey Howard,' she said warmly, heading for the cupboards in the kitchen.

' Right, I'm off to meet Leroy! ' Vince called. After an inquiry into when he'd be back (he didn't know) and if he'd be back for dinner (he had no idea if he'd be back at all that night) his friends said goodbye and let him leave the house.

' These girls must be something special,' Howard said,' it's not like him to be up so early. '

Holly cleared her throat - he was still reading the paper, and she'd been staring at him. He was quite handsome when he was concentrating. ' Um ... yeah,' she said. God, this wasn't like her, she thought, she wasn't one to get tounge tied, or shy.

This was all the Moon's fault - it had gone on about love, with its infuriating song, and if had made her realise she was in love with Howard. Being in love was something new - it was ... _weird. _It made her feel insecure and light-headed.

She realised she was still staring at his face in profile, and turned her back to him, flicking the switch on the kettle.

' Cuppa? ' she asked him, the two syllabes catching in her throat.

' Mmmmm, please,' he agreed.

' Better make Naboo and Bollo one too - last time I missed them out, I thought Bollo was going to throw something at me,' she told him.

She opened the cupboard where the cups were kept, only to see that none of them were there. They weren't on the draining board from where she'd done the washing up last night, either. Yeah, she'd actually done it - they worked on a rota for cooking, cleaning the kitchen and living room, and doing the dishes. A rota which Vince never stuck to and Bollo usually forgot about, which meant that the other three got to do the bulk of it.

Sighed, she opened the next cupboard - maybe someone had put them away in the wrong place. The cups weren't in any of the lower cupboards.

By now she was opening and shutting the doors of said cupboards quite loudly, and Howard had lowered his newpaper to watch her in amusement.

Pulling a face, she stretched out an arm and yanked open the cupboard above the one she'd originally tried. The cups were all there on the higher of the two shelves - the shelf she couldn't reach.

' Ugh,' she complained, looking over her shoulder at Howard,' Bollo's put everything away again, I take it? Why does he have to put them there? He knows I can't reach up there - nor can Naboo, he's even shorter than I am.'

Howard continued to look amused,' Here, let me help,' he said, coming to stand behind her and reaching up to retrieve the mugs. Her back was pressed against his chest and he blushed at the close proximity - she feeling equally flustered.

She could feel his quick heartbeat as she was pressed against him, and one of his arms was almost touching her cheek as he reached up.

He was embarrassed at being so close, but also pleased about the way being close to her gave him such a thrill. Her stomach lurched with every milli-second of the touch.

When he put the 4th and final cup on the worktop, Holly turned around quickly, her nose pressed against his chest. She blushed and lifted her head.

A moment of electricity seemed to pass between them and they just stared at each other. Howard found himself spell-bound by her vivid blue eyes, which seemed only more vivid by the bright blue hat and matching feather boa. Their hips were almost welded together and neither of them seemed to have the will power to move.

Holly smiled - not her usual broad grin, but a softer smile - and looked down, breaking the gaze, before looking back at him.

Howard cleared his throat,' Well ... um ... '

Holly shook her head,' Sorry, Howard,' she mumbled, placing her hands on his shoulders and sliding from her place, trapped between Howard and the worktop.

Howard stood there for a minute as she crossed to the fridge to get some milk, wondering what had just happened - they'd just ... stood there. God, things were getting weird.

Holly tried to hide from Howard by heading for the fridge. What was happening wth them? She'd just stood there ... staring. Was this what love was? God, love was odd.

*****

The house phone rang at about 6pm, and Howard was the one who answered it.

He was met by an excited Vince telling him he was going to a club with Leroy and the girls, and probably wouldn't be bakc that night.

Holly was watching America's Top Model, which she'd taped a few days early and not had a chance to watch until now, and listened to Howard's side of the conversation.

' Vince, yeah, hi ... yeah, we're all fine ... oh, at all? ... Alright, well thanks for letting us know, you know how your sister would flap about it ... d'you want to talk to her, by the way? She's just here ... '

' Nah, you're alright,' Holly heard Vince say loudly, clearly meaning for Holly to hear.

' Cheers, Vince! ' Holly shouted, knowing Vince would hear her,' nothing like a bit of love from your big brother, is there? '

' Ok see you later, Vince,' Howard said, hanging up.

He then looked at Holly,' Vince says he's off to a club tonight - getting on well with one of the girls, might not be back tonight. '

Holly nodded,' Alright. Great, actually - means I get the room to myself. I love him like, but he's started snoring. I can't do with it ... Oh no way! It's Vince's turn to do all the washing up '

' So I'll do it,' Howard shrugged.

' You're cooking,' Holly reminded him,' it's not fair that you have to do everything ... '

' I don't mind,' Howard told her.

Holly paused before saying,' I'll tell you what; you cook and I'll do the washing up,' she offered.

' You washed up last night,' Howard pointed out,' and you hate washing up ... you say it messes your nails up ... how about we_ both _do the washing up, eh? You wash, I'll dry. Or the other way around. '

Howard rustled up a lasagne for dinner - Howard was quite a good cook, Bollo was suprisingly good and Naboo cooked all sorts of things with spices and herbs. Vince couldn't cook at all - his turns to cook usually compromised of micro-wave meals and takeouts.

When she first moved in, Holly had tried to cook, but after the time she set fire to the kitchen - resulting in she and Vince running around throwing water and covering it up with towels, and Howard then exasperatedly showing them where the fire extinguisher was - Naboo banned her from using the kitchen. So she too, resorted to take-away menus.

After eating, Bollo and Naboo went to tidy up the attic leaving the other two together.

Holly grinned at the pile of dishes in the sink - so many that they were almost falling out of said sink. It was suprising just how many pots and pans Howard had managed to use in cooking a meal for just _four _people.

' Guess we'd better get on with this lot, yeah? ' she smirked at him.

Howard nodded,' What're you doing? ' he asked.

She paused, before saying,' I'll wash up. I hated getting my nails messed up, but then Vince showed me those cool rubber gloves he uses, so it's quite fun now. '

Howard laughed and soon after, Holly was standing at the sink wearing the pink and green striped rubber gloves which went all the up to her elbows. Howard stood beside her, in front of the draining board, holding an orange towel.

' Did you have to put that much washing up liquid in? ' Howard asked her, shaking his head.

Holly picked up a plate and washed it with the green scrub, grinning without looking at him,' But I like all the bubbles ... they're funny! '

Howard rolled his eyes and didn't answer.

They slipped into a silence which lasted only a few moments, before Holly filled it - silence wasn't good, she decided. ' You know,' she said,' I hope Vince starts taking a few more nights out - I could do without his snoring sometimes.'

' Is that why you went on the roof last night? ' Howard asked.

Holly shrugged,' No that was just - hey wait! How did you know I was out there? '

Howard pulled a face,' I dunno - I couldn't sleep, and I heard someone go up to the attic. Knew it wasn't Vince since he sleeps like a baby - Bollo hates going on the roof and it didn't seem like Naboo, because his room's at the other end of the corridor . . . so what were you doing out there? '

Holly blushed, not wanting to tell him of her pondering love,' I was talking to the moon. '

Howard gave her a look of disbelief - the look he often gave Vince when he was talking about things that just sounded like rubbish,' You were talking to the moon? ' he asked.

' Yeah,' she answered innocently.

' Talking? To the moon? ' Howard asked as she handed him a plate.

' Yeah! ' she repeated, more defensively this time.

' And does the moon ... talk back? ' Howard asked, raising his eyebrows.

' Sure does,' nodded Holly,' I dunno if it talks to everyone, but it always talks to me when I try talking to it. S'quite nice actually, if a little ... backwards. '

' So, just to clarify, you went on the roof to talk to the moon? ' Howard asked.

' Oh, no,' Holly told him, shaking his head,' I actually went there to just sit and think and stuff, and I ended up talking to the moon. Don't you think the roof is a good place to sit and think and stuff? '

' What d'you have to think about? ' he asked.

She shrugged, knowing she couldn't tell him she'd been thinking about her newly discovered love for him - that was just out of the question.

' C'mon, you're a sunshine kid,' Howard grinned,' you don't get all serious and brooding ... '

Holly stuck her tounge out at him, and gathered some of the bubbles up in her hands, throwing them in Howards face.

She laughed as Howard spluttered; Howard narrowed his eyes and it made her laugh even more.

' You look like a shrimp,' she giggled, causing him to frown at her.

' Howard Moon does not look like a shrimp, Sir,' he said indignantly,' or madam, I suppose. '

She gathered more of the frothy bubbles in her hands and batted them in his direction. He tried batting them back, and after this proved inefficent, he decided enough was enough and leaned into the sink, picking up a handful of bubbles and shoving them into her face.

' My hair,' she shrieked, a hand flying to the bits of her hair that hung out from the bottom of the trilby,' Right, that's it - this means war! '

And then they were involved in a full scale war. Neither of them stopped to think how childish it was - somehow it didn't matter right now. All they were bothered about was having fun.

Eventually, their war was broken up when Naboo stormed into the kitchen.

' Will you two ballbags keep the noise down? ' he demanded,' and what the hell have you done to my kitchen? It looks a right state! '

It was true that water was everywhere and the most of the dishes remained unwashed. Howard and Holly's clothes were all wet and both of them were pink cheeked and out of breath from the laughter.

' Get it cleaned up, will you? ' Naboo commanded before stalking away.

When he was gone, Holly burst into quiet giggles, and Howard rolled his eyes.

' This is all your fault, Holly. You and your bubbles. '


	9. You're a Natural!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

A week later, Holly, Vince and Howard were at work in the shop. Or at least, Howard was sitting behind the counter in boredom, and the siblings were engaged in lively conversation with a customer.

The customer - a flamboyant man in his mid-twenties who was poring over the collection of clothes - seemed very taken with both Vince and Holly, and Howard couldn't blame him; Holly had such a brilliant personality after all. She was a nice person, and she was very pretty and lovely. Oh, and Vince was a good guy too.

' That's well cool,' Holly said, as the customer slipped on a miliatary style jacket - which was purple.

' Really? ' asked the customer.

' Yeah,' grinned Holly,' you should go for it ... '

The man nodded,' I think I will ... and where's that hat from, by the way? It's so cool! '

Howard rolled his eyes from behind today's newspaper - that girl seemed to have a never ending supply of hats, and was particularly fond of cowboy hats.

Today she wore a bright blue cowboy at with her initials in golden gems - of course the hat added to her strange outfit; skinny red jeans, an almost plain white t-shirt (but not so plain with several strings of beads hanging around her neck) and white platforms. Her blue feather boa - which she seemed to like as much as her hats - was tied around her wrist.

' I found it in a thrift shop,' she answered,' then I bought some little glue-on gems from a stationary shop and it ended up looking like this. '

Then the man began to inquire after Vince's boots and Vince led him towards the counter, where he ringed up the item and sorted out the sale.

' See ya later,' Holly called after the customer left.

After that, Vince went back to sitting in his comfy chair by the door. Howard remained sitting in the chair behind the counter. Holly sat on the counter, facing Howard, her legs dangling off the edge and occasionally pressing against one of his legs.

When he'd gone, Howard looked at Holly,' You're a natural,' he said,' the customers seem to like you. '

' What about me? ' demanded Vince,' I was an integral part of that sale. '

Holly held up a hand,' Woah, wait - where did you learn that ... that word? '

Howard couldn't help but smile at the way that Holly didn't know the word either, and it twisted into a smirk when Vince answered,' I was playing scrabble with Naboo again - he knows all sorts of crazy words. '

Howard was no longer listening when Vince went off on a rant about how Naboo "made up words just for scrabble" (as if it wasn't exactly what Vince did too). Instead, he was thinking about Holly, as he did so often. She was amazing - why did he have to be so awkward around here; he needed to do something. He was Howard Moon, man of action. He could get a woman if he wanted to. Not that Holly would want him anyway. And there was the worry of how Vince would react.

Holly was no longer listening as Vince went on about Naboo's "cheating." Instead, she was thinking about Howard - something which she did all too often now. Sure, she'd only known him for 5 or 6 weeks, but he was brilliant, wasn't he? Completely genius! Maybe she should say something to him about how she felt? What would be say? What would Vince say?

Holly looked up at Howard, and realised that he was looking at her too. She smiled warmly and he offered a sort of weaker smile in return, before she looked away. Looking back a moment later, she caught his eye again and coloured this time. Still, neither of them broke the look, until Vince shouted at them.

' Are either of you even listening to me?! '

Holly smiled indulgently,' Course we are. '

Vince was satisfied with this comfirmation and continued to tell the pair of them about Naboo's "cheating", until he suddenly broke off mid-sentence and said,' Holly, d'you think my hair's a bit ... wrong, today? '

His sister considered this before telling him,' Nah - your hair's genius! You _know _that. '

' I had to use normal shampoo this morning, because mine was empty - although I don't remember using the last of it. Though s'not as if anyone else would nick it - all my stuff's in its own little cupboard, after all ... '

Holly said nothing, avoiding his eyes.

' Hol? ' Vince prompted.

' ... '

' Holly! You used my shampoo! ' he said, pointing an accusing finger at her,' how could you? It's thanks you to that my hair looks rubbish now! '

' I told ya Vince, it looks fine,' she sighed, looking away from him. She looked out towards the door, and she saw a figure across the street which immediately caught her attention.

She'd recognise that man at once - even if it _was _across the shop, and then across the street. She realised at once that he was heading for the shop, and stood up at once.

' Oh God,' she muttered, looking - and feeling - terrified,' Vince! Howard! You have to help me! '

' What? ' Vince asked, looking at her quickly, identical blue eyes meeting. Howard raised his eyebrows.

Holly swallowed and looked towards the door - he'd crossed the street - he was very close to the shop - oh god, he was going to come in here ...

' Listen,' she said quickly,' we don't have time for this - Howard, Vince, I'm not here. When he asks - I'm not here. '

With that, she scrambled to the side of the counter where customers couldn't see and knelt down, out of sight - there wasn't enough time to go anywhere else. Moments before he - Jimmy Tools - entered the store, a thought struck Holly - Vince! Tools would easily see the resemblance ... then he'd know he was in the right place ...

' Vince! ' she hissed, looking up quicky,' hide! Now! Down here! '

' Why? ' he hissed in return.

' Now! ' she replied, panic evident in her voice. Her brother noted her panic with concern, and joined her hiding behind the counter, without hesitation,' Howard - you've never heard of either of us! '

When the shop door opened, Holly - knelt on all fours - held her breath in worry. Vince felt her tense beside him - they were so close together, they were touching, after all, there wasn't much room behind the counter.

He lifted a hand from the ground and placed it on her shoulder, squeezing gently.

She smiled gratefully and placed one of her own hands over his.

Meanwhile, Howard was standing in front of the counter - since there was now no room to get behind it. He was looking into the face of a taller man - if several years younger - with broad shoulders and muscular arms.

' I'm looking for someone,' he said.

Howard raised his eyebrows,' Oh? ' he asked politely.

Jimmy Tools wasn't nearly so polite,' Holly Noir - pretty sure she's around here somewhere. '

Under the counter, Vince's eyes met Holly's, and he understood at once who the man was - the beater from Newcastle. The man she owed all the money to, and had just run away from. Bugger. He'd found her.

Howard simply shrugged,' N-no, I'm afraid I don't know her. ' Howard knew that he had to keep strong for Holly - Holly was clearly very worried .. she was hiding for god's sake ... he had to help.

' You sure? ' Tools pressed,' um, skinny bird, bit of a midget. Big hooked nose and dresses like some sort of futuristic hooker. '

Holly frowned at the description of herself - how dare he say that?! Vince's hand tightened on her shoulder when he saw her saddened face.

Howard too, wasn't pleased with this description - Holly was beautiful! Her dress sense was kind of endearing, and her nose was quite distinctive, yeah, but it was hardly hooked - it was fine.

' Well? Seen her? '

' No, Sir,' Howard replied cooly.

' Oh. I don't believe you,' he said, taking a step closer - closer and closer until Howard was backed against a cupboard,' you're a liar. '

' Well, d'you see her here? ' challenged Howard, much braver than he actually felt.

' Surely there aren't many shops with the same weird name as this shop? I doubt I've gotten mixed up - you're a liar. I'm reliably informed that the little cow would have come running here - she's got some lady-boy brother or something here, apparently. D'you know anyone with the surname Noir? '

Vince wasn't too bothered by being confused with a woman, most of the time, but hearing it come from the mouth of this geezer ... He gritted his teeth - and _how dare _anyone call _his _little sister a cow?

' No,' Howard answered simply.

Tools drew himself up to full height, glared at Howard before saying,' I still don't believe you - I'm coming back tomorrow. I'll find her here, I know it. '

Moments later, after a loud slam of the door, Howard sighed,' Um ... guys? It's all clear now ... '

Vince scrambled out from under the counter and helped his sister up. Howard peeled himself from the side of the cupboard. Both men stared at her.

' I'm sorry,' Holly whispered, tears forming in her eyes.

Vince immediately hugged her as tight as he possibly could - this was what they did ... when in doubt, and when thing's weren't going right, have a hug. Or possibly a poncho.

' God, Vince,' Holly sighed,' I'm sorry - I've brought him here. He's gonna get me - he might get you too. I'm - '

' Shhhh, Hol, shhh,' Vince said, kissing the top of her head before letting go and holding her at arms length.

' What am I gonna do now? ' she whispered.

Vince bit down on his lip so hard it was in danger of bleeding, his grip tightening, before he finally answered,' Maybe Naboo could brew something ... I dunno ... there's gotta be something ... '

' I dunno,' Holly echoed,' he might not want to get caught up in all this. '

' He's a good guy, Holly, you know that,' Vince said, rubbing her arms,' he'll do something to help. He always comes through for us in the end. We'll talk to him when he gets back from Shamansbury's, or wherever he went this time ... '

' In the meantime,' Howard said,' maybe you shouldn't be in the shop tomorrow. I mean, if he's going to be back tomorrow ... we don't want anything to happen to you ... '

Both Holly and Vince turned to look at Howard as if they'd only just remembered he was still there. Then Holly gave him one of those warm smiles which melted him.

' Oh, Howard,' she sighed, shaking her head,' thank you ... you were so brave to just do what I said, and stick up for me like that ... '

Howard shrugged, ' I - I - '

' Thanks,' she whispered,' you were great.

Howard couldn't find any words, and just smiled at her. Suddenly, she'd thrown herself across the room and wrapped her arms around him. He shouldn't have been suprised really, he mused as her pale arms slipped easily around his neck.

' Don't touch me,' Howard said quietly.

Holly frowned,' You what? I've touched you sometimes - you don't complain. And this is my hour of need Howard! ' she added, another tear trickling down her cheek.

Vince glared at Howard for daring to upset his sister, and Howard could have slapped himself; whhat had made him say that? ' Um .. sorry,' he said,' I used to have a strict no touching rule ... guess it still slips through sometimes. '

Holly sniffed, ignoring him, and throwing her arms around him again.

' I mean it,' Howard muttered,' don't ever touch me. '

' Howard! ' Vince hissed, very close to gathering his sister up in his own arms again, and shoving Howard away.

Holly however, laughed and nestled closer into him.


	10. We Kinda Need Your Help

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **

The Mighty Boosh

When Naboo and Bollo returned from their outing that day, they were immediately confronted by Vince jumping up from the sofa.

' You're back! Good, you're back! '

Naboo took a step away and nodded,' Alright, Vince? '

Vince looked back at Holly and Howard, who were also sat in the living room, and then to Naboo,' We kinda need your help ... ' he told the shaman.

Naboo rolled his eyes,' You better not have been at my potions again - last time you did that Vince, you very nearly got pregnant. '

Vince shuddered at the memory of it,' No, the thing is, you know ... that guy who Holly knew up north? He came into the shop today, looking for me an' her. '

On the sofa, Holly winced at the memory of it. Naboo looked at her,' And you want me to do something? '

' Please,' she sighed,' There has to be someting you could do? '

Naboo paused before saying,' I suppose I've gotta do something, haven't I? If he gets you, I'll lose rent money, and someone to work in the shop. '

Vince glared, and the shaman shrugged,' What? Of course it's because she's a friend too - I thought that went without saying .'

Holly gave him a weak smile.

' So what can you do? He said he'd come back tomorrow to keep checking if she was here,' Howard informed the shaman.

Naboo shrugged,' I dunno - I'll probably find something in an old book. And he'll be back tomorrow? '

His answer was three glum nods.

' Right,' Naboo nodded,' If I brew something quickly, you can slip it to him when he comes back. Maybe some magic dust or something, might do the trick . . . '

Holly cleared her throat and stood up,' I'm going to go out for a bit ...'

' What? ' Howard demanded, at the same time Vince hissed.

' No you're not! '

Holly rolled her eyes,' I'm only going to clear out the alley behind the shop! Howard's only being telling us to do it for a month, Vince. '

' Oh,' Howard said, pleasantly suprised,' Then I'll come and help you, shall I? '

Holly smiled gratefully and together they left the flat.

When they'd gone, Bollo grunted,' Howard like Holly. '

Vince raised his eyebrows,' No he doesn't; what're you talking about? Howard's useless with women. '

Naboo laughed,' How have you _not _noticed? He's always hanging around her. And he might not be as useless as you think - she seems to be pretty in to him too. '

Vince's heart beat quickened, at the mere thought of it. How dare Howard be interested in Holly? You can't like your best mate's little sister! That's like ... it's like incest or something! And no relation of his was going anywhere near a _jazz _maverick!

Was he over-reacting, Vince wondered. S'not like anything was going on between them anyway. It wouldn't. On the other hand, he'd react how he wanted - no-one was good enough for his sister.

And Howard was told old for her too, wasn't he? Holly was 27. Howard was ... oh, he couldn't remember ... most people seemed to think Howard was several years older than Vince, but they were at school together ... then again, Vince had started a few years too late due to living in the jungle ...

Howard could only be about 3 years older, decided Vince. Which made him 8 years older than Holly. Too old, decided Vince. Although, wasn't this how all older brothers thought? Oh, see, now he was just confused.

' Vince? ' Naboo said tentively,' Vince! '

Vince looked at Naboo in suprise.

' Sorry,' shrugged Naboo,' you were just kinda staring at one spot ... spaced out or something ... '

' Sorry,' Vince mumbled, before going back to contemplating (freaking out over) the possible relationship between his sister and his best friend.


	11. You're the Best

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

That night, Vince and Holly both lay in their beds, awake and staring at the ceiling.

After a while, Vince whispered,' Holly? You still awake? '

Holly rolled over onto her side and pulled the bed covers away from her face, so she could see him better,' Yeah. '

Vince rolled over too, making them a mirror image of each other.

' What d'you want? ' Holly whispered, trying to flatten down the back of her hair.

Vince sighed,' Earlier on, Naboo mentioned that Howard might have a thing for you, and you might be into Howard too ... '

' Oh,' Holly said flatly, glad he couldn't see her face properly in the darkened room.

' But that's just ridiculous right? ' Vince said laughing a little,' I mean - you and _him? _There's no way, right? That would be totally weird - you and Howard'd never like that, would you? You're too different, it'd just be weird ... '

Holly, for a moment, considered telling her brother her feelings for Howard, but decided not to. After all, he was already freaking out at the thought of it, it seemed. Instead she laughed too,' Nah, that's just stupid. '

' Oh,' Vince breathed,' good, then. '

Holly cleared her throat,' Just, you know, out of interest - what would you say if me and Howard _were, _you know ... '

Vince snorted and laughed before composing himself,' I'm sorry, it's just - you're all lively and cheery and Howard's miserable and _sensible. _I just ... don't see it ... '

Holly nodded,' Right, yeah. '

They fell into a short silence, broken by Holly asking,' Hey Vince? '

' Yeah? '

' What d'we do tomorrow, when Jimmy comes back? He's gonna get me, if he sees me. I'm ... I'm worried about it ... ' she confided.

Vince propped himself up on one elbow to look at her properly,' Now you listen to me, Hol; _nothing _is going to happen, you hear me? Naboo's gonna sort it out and then we can be all happy and that. I won't let anything happen. '

' But - '

' But nothing,' Vince said,' no-one comes near my sister on _my _watch. '

Holly smiled, a smile he could about make out in the dark,' Thanks Vince ... '

Another silence passed between them, and just when Vince was certain his sister had fallen asleep, she whispered,

' Hey Vince? '

He smiled,' Yeah? '

' You're the best. '

Vince grinned sleepily and fell asleep shortly after pondering her comment - he _wasn't_ the best ... he was just nice to her, and cheered her up when she was down, and tried to sort her problems out for her.

He just did for her what any big brother did for the little sister her loved.


	12. Stupid JazzFunk

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Howard beamed - actually beamed - when Holly entered the kitchen the next morning. Then he caught himself and hastily re-arranged his features. Howard Moon didn't beam like that - maybe Vince did, and Holly did, but Howard was more reserved.

' Morning,' Holly smiled, before noticing the c.d player on the work top,' Oh for god's sake,' she muttered, turning it off.

' Hey! ' Howard protested, turning around quickly.

' I'm sorry, but we are _not _listening to that stupid jazz-funk before nine o clock. If you want some jazz music on, we're having normal plain jazz. Or we'll have a bit of Human League. '

' I'm in the mood for jazz-funk! And I've told you before, sunshine kid, that music of yours makes me physically sick,' Howard complained.

' Then we won't listen to anything,' Holly countered, sitting opposite him at the kitchen table and reaching over to steal a piece of toast from Howard's plate.

She smirked as she took a bite from the toast and he rolled his eyes. As she ate it, Howard watched her; she seemed to get more beautiful by the day, even if he still thought her dress sense was just weird. Today she was covered in glitter and sequins. Not that she couldn't pull it off, he thought.

Today she wore silver drainpipes and little silver kitten heels. Her torso was adorned in a golden vest covered all over in sequins. She had a black belt around her waist with the words _Jesus Loves You _spelt out in silver studs. Around her neck was a silky silver scarf. And of course, she was wearing one of her hats - this one a gold cowboy hat covered in glitter.

' What? Have I got something on my face? '

Howard realised he was staring, and blushed,' N-no, it's nothing. '

' Oh. '

Howard cleared his throat and decided that things between he and Holly needed to progress, before he got stuck in the friends rut, and she always say him as just as friend.

Mustering up all the courage he could find - which was very litte right now - he began,' So, um, I was thinking ... maybe tonight, you and me could ... '

Holly's eyes seemed to light up and she grinned, leaning closer to him, over the table..

' Hey guys,' Naboo called as he swept into the kitchen.

Howard sighed and gritted his teeth together. Holly very nearly groaned - she'd been dying to find out what Howard was going to ask - and she closed her eyes, her face falling.

Naboo noticed their reactions to his entrance and smirked,' Am I interrupting something? '

' No,' Howard said, much too quickly, whilst Holly leant back in her seat and looked away from Howard.

Naboo looked between them, wondering just what he _had _walked in on, before Holly asked him,' So, have you got something to sort out Jimmy? '

Howard noticed how she shuddered even saying the name, and he wanted to wrap his arms around her and look after her, protect her from everything.

Naboo nodded,' Right, I've got this dust, which you need to blow out of a digeridoo. Forget-me-lots. I've made it up so he'll forget all about you, Holly. '

' Genius,' she smiled,' so all I have to do is blow this in his face? '

' Yeah,' Naboo nodded,' or Vince or Howard could do if, if you'd prefer. '

' Great,' Holly grinned, taking the digeridoo that Naboo held out and hugging him,' thank you. Thanks a lot. I'll - I'll go open up the shop, Howard, you finish your cuppa. '

With that she skipped away, and the moment she was gone, Naboo turned to Howard.

' Right,' he said,' I kinda lied to Holly. The thing is, this dust needs to be blown by someone who loves Holly. '

Howard raised his eyebrows,' A-and why're you telling me? Vince can do it, can't he then? '

' Nah,' Naboo insisted,' it has to be someone who's _in love _with Holly, not family love like Vince. '

Howard stammered,' W-why should it be me then? '

Naboo just laughed,' Aw come off it, Howard. You're so into her, it's unreal. You're in love with Holly Noir, you just won't admit it to anyone. '

Howard was about to say something, but paused - this was his chance to be Holly's hero,' Yeah,' he said, feeling very proud,' I'll do it - I want to help her. I'll do it.'

' Right, great,' Naboo said, holding back a laugh,' me an' Bollo are off to see Pete - he says they've got some new deals at Dixons. '

*****

Naboo and Bollo left out of the back door which led into the alley, and Howard joined Holly downstairs in the shop.

He stood in the doorway and watched as Holly turned over the Open/Closed sign, humming to herself happily.

' The Beatles? ' Howard asked, noting what she was humming - All you need is love.

She didn't even flinch or gasp, not even suprised that he'd shown up so quickly. She just turned around and grinned,' Yep. Just a song I heard somewhere. ' she decided not to mention that she'd heard it from the moon. ' Vince still not up? '

' No,' answered Howard, going to check that the jazz records were all still in place, as Holly sat on the counter,' you know we hardly ever see Vince before 10AM. '

' Right,' Holly nodded, reaching for the latest copy of cheekbone, which Vince had left downstairs last night,' say, um, Howard? '

' Hmm? '

' Before Naboo came into the kitchen, you were gonna say something,' Holly said,' I was just wondering what that was, exactly? '

Howard lost his bottle. He couldn't ask her now - somehow that courage from before had just ... gone. Damm Naboo for interrupting,' Nothing,' he told her, not looking at her properly,' it doesn't matter now .'

' Oh. ' Holly had been certain he was going to ask her out - it was stupid to think Howard would be interested. Sighing heavily, she turned the page of the magazine and tried to forget.

It was mid-afternoon when Holly was in the little store-room at the back of the shop. They knew it needed cleaning out, so the three of them - Vince having finally emerged from upstairs - had drawn straws. Holly got the short straw.

She tried to move a big box, which turned out to be far too heavy. Stumbling, she caught her foot in a long length of rope which was left over from a camping trip, and fell straight over.

' Ow,' she winced, her body aching.

In a flash, Vince was stood in the doorway of the storeroom,' You alright? ' he demanded quickly.

' M'fine,' she said from where she lay on the floor,' just kinda ... hurts like hell. '

Vince stepped over some of the rubbish there and grasped her hands, helping her to her feet. ' God, what're you like? ' Vince laughed as she stood up and let go of his hands.

' Are you alright? ' Howard asked as Holly followed Vince into the shop.

Holly pressed a hand to her side,' Think I've cut it on something,' she said, one hand sliding under the bottom of her top, where she poked her side. When she withdrew her hand, it was stained with a bit of blood.

' Plaster? ' Howard offered.

She nodded.

Vince grinned as Howard went in search of the medical stuff. Calling after his friend, he shouted,' See if there's any of them ones with the Mr Men on them! '

When Howard came back with a few different sized plasters, he handed her them awkwardly, not knowing what to do.

She frowned at him,' Well I can't do it myself - it's in an awkward place! '

Howard looked at Vince - willing Vince to do it - he (Howard) couldn't do it. He was embarrassed just thinking about it.

Vince shrugged,' I don't even know how a plaster actually works. I've never really bothered with them. D'you glue it on? D'you peel that things on the back off, or is that meant to be there? D'you - '

' Oh, forget it,' Howard muttered,' I'll do it,' he decided, telling himself to calm down and just et it over with, even if he _was _very embarrassed about the thought of being so close to her.

Howard was quite a bit taller than Holly, and knelt down at her side.

She lifted up her gold sequined top with two shaky hands. She lifted it over her stomach and held the fabric above the place where the cut was in her side.

Howard's eyes wandered across her smooth, creamy skin, and he had to fight to tell himself to focus on the job. He placed the plaster on her side and flattened it down with one hand.

His hands tingled at the touch, and Holly's stomach lurched at the touch of his hands against her skin.

Howard drew himself up to full height and smiled gently. She gave him a grateful smile and was about to let go of her top, when Vince demanded,' What's that? '

Holly looked down at her body and quickly dropped her shirt,' Nothing,' she insisted.

' It was _not _nothing,' Vince cried, getting close enough to her and yanking at the fabric, pulling up just a little.

He and Howard stared at the mark across her stomach. It looked quite similar to Vince's. It was a long line which went horizontally just above her belly button.

' What happened? ' Howard asked, shaking his head.

' Hair straightners,' was her reply,' he got really mad one time. This was when I first declined his offer of becoming a lap dancer. I was doing my hair, he threw me against the wall, grabbed the straightners, and ... '

' Jesus Christ, Hol,' Vince sighed,' it's - I feel like such a bad brother. '

' Shut up; don't be stupid,' she said,' S'not important now. '

Vince reached forward hugged her. Her top still up a little, his hands on her back, he felt a few small lines on her back,' Not more? ' he asked.

She pushed him away,' It's nothing - it's in the past now. Just leave it, will ya? '

' Holly? ' Vince pressed.

' Fine. It was a spanner. He's into D.I.Y, you know. That's how he got his name - Jimmy Tools. He's actually called Jimmy Smith, but he got into D.I.Y, and then he started battering the people who annoyed him, with his tools. '

' Holly,' Vince frowned,' what else - '

' I've told you! ' hissed his sister,' it's all in the past! Please, Vince, just leave it ... '

As Vince relucantly let go of his sister and left her alone, Holly sat down on the counter, whilst Howard sat in the chair behind the counter.

Howard noticed how Holly's left hand was on her back, as she traced the lines where the scars were. Howard winced, thinking about what she'd been through, and still reeling from the effects of touching Holly's skin and being so close.

The door swung open loudly, and all three looked up.

Damn, Tools was back, and none of them had noticed. This time she didn't have time to hide, and nor did Vince, but at least this time, they had a method - they knew what to do.

' Ah,' boomed Tools,' so you _were _lying,' he said, looking at Howard, before turning to Holly.

Holly bit down on her lip, and took a step backwards.

Tools sneered,' I knew I'd find you - you owe me thousands. You thought you could get away from me? You stupid cow. '

' Hey! ' Vince cried in protest, but backing away when Tools turned to face him.

' Ah,' the bully said,' the girly brother, right? Well, Holly, you made a mistake coming here; these two idiots don't look as if they could help anyone out. '

' Get lost,' snapped Holly,' Vince and Howard're both genius! '

Tools laughing, striding towards her, at which point she edged away until she was stood at Howard's side, Vince quickly coming to stand on her other side in the role of the protective brother.

' You, Holly, are pathetic, you know that? ' Tools laughed,' you're nothing but a hooked nosed midget with the dress sense of a hooker. '

' Howard,' Vince hissed,' where's that thing of Naboo's ... '

Howard grabbed the digeridoo from besides the counter and lifted it up,' You, sir, are history. '

He blew hard into the digeridoo and a lot of brown dust shot out of the bottom, where it hit Tools in the face and caused him to fall to the ground.

' Is he - ? ' Vince asked.

' Dead? ' finished Howard,' shouldn't be - Naboo said it would just make him forget who Holly was. . .'

Tools groaned,' Oh, God. Where am I? ' he asked, sitting up,' who am I? '

Holly had to stop herself squealing with joy - not only had he forgotten who Holly was, he'd forgotten everything, by the sounds of it.

Holly was in shock that her problems were over and could barely talk. She closed her eyes and leant back against the counter, barely aware of Howard and Vince ushering the new forgetful Tools out of the shop.

' Guess that stuff was stronger than Naboo thought,' laughed Vince,' Genius! '

He then noticed that his sister was in a state of shock and crossed the room to get to her.

' Holly,' he said, poking her arm,' it's all over. '

' Howard,' she breathed, looking up, and almost ignoring Vince completely.

Howard looked at her in suprise - he'd expected her to throw her arms around Vince and hug him, leaving Howard out.

' Oh Howard, you did it,' she whispered, her arms around him before he eve noticed what was happening,' that was amazing - you're such a hero,' she told him.

Howard thought of what Naboo had told him - how it had to be the person who loved Holly. Now he was Holly's hero - this was great. He hugged her back and kissed the top of her head.

When they broke apart, Vince approached his best friend,' Thanks,' he said,' you were really good. I'd have freaked out. '

He too, tried to hug Howard, but Howard brushed him off,' Don't touch me,' he said.

Vince frowned,' You let _her _touch you! ' he protested, pointing an accusing finger at his sister.

Howard shrugged and gave no answer.

Vince, meanwhile, worried. Howard let Holly hug him, but wouldn't let anyone else. Why? _Why? _Vince worried that Naboo was right, that Holly had lied to him last night. Vince worried that he'd lose both his sister and his best mate to _love, _of all things.


	13. Little Earth Girl

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

The 5 flat-mates watched t.v together that night. After an argument, they ended up watching Mr Benn on the childrens channel (Vince's choice, backed by Bollo. Howard had wanted the discovery channel, Holly wanted America's Top Model, and Naboo wanted Doctor Who)

Vince was the first to announce he was going to sleep, closely followed by Bollo, and Holly and Naboo half hour later. Howard stayed up for a bit, happy to flick to the discovery channel.

Whilst he sat in the living room, he heard footsteps in the corridor, and then going up to the attic.

After 10 minutes, he decided to investigate - maybe it was Holly. It'd be nice to spend some time with her, alone.

*****

Holly had only just gone to the bedroom and hadn't even got into her pajamas before deciding that needed to think. So, leaving the flat as quietly as possible, she went to her favourite spot for thinking. The roof, of course.

She sat on the top, leaning against the bricks where the chimney pots sat.

Sighing, she looked up at the moon.

' Well, here we are again,' she smiled sadly.

The Moon spun around, its face now looking down at her,' Ah, my little earth girl - you are back to see the Moon? '

' Just gotta think,' she said.

' About love again? ' the Moon asked,' ah love. When you are the moon, there is not much love for you. But ' the moon began to sing,' All you need is love. All you need is love. '

Holly laughed,' That's a nice song - you sung that to me before, remember? '

' Uh, yes,' the Moon replied,' you .. um .. you ain't got the guy yet? '

' No,' Holly whispered.

The little window from the attic opened slowly and Howard poked his head out of the top. He smiled when he saw her,' Holly, I thought it might be you up here. '

' Hello Howard,' she said.

' Talking to the moon again? ' Howard asked, climbing out of the roof and scrambling across the tiles, trying to get to her side.

Holly looked at the moon - who'd quickly turned away when Howard appeared - before looking back at Howard,' Nah, he's gone now. He's leaving us to it. '

There was a pause before Holly said,' You - you were really great today, you know that? I know you think it was nothing, but it means a lot to me that you're always so nice to me. '

' Don't be stupid,' he said,' I'd do anything for my friends. '

Holly smiled,' You're a really good friend, Howard,' she told him.

Howard's courage was coming back and he reached out with one hand, taking Holly's hat from her head. ' That's better,' he said,' that hat just hides your face - don't hide your face, you're too pretty for that. '

Holly laughed, trying to reach for her hat. Howard however, just put the hat on his own head, and she laughed harder. Then it registered within her - he'd just called her pretty.

' You don't think I'm pretty,' she said, shaking her head, and looking away, looking over all of Dalston.

Besides her, Howard shifted closer,' Course I do. '

' Nah,' Holly said, leaning against him, her head on his shoulder,' I'm not pretty. Jimmy said it himself - I'm too short, and I've got this stupid hooked nose. I'm just not pretty at all. '

' No, you are,' Howard said, deciding that this was it. For once, Howard Moon was going to get the girl, ' you're actually beautiful. '

Holly looked up at him in suprise, lifting her head from his shoulder and staring at him.

He continued,' Who cares if you're not as tall as Vince, or me? I don't care. You've got a great body, and um ... lovely cream coloured skin. And there's nothing wrong with this nose,' he added, tapping her nose lightly.

She smiled, hoping he'd gone on with it.

He did, the courage now taking him away,' And you've got a lovely face, with your big bright blue eyes. And your glossy, shiny hair. And your smile ... you've got this fantastic warm smile.

To Howard's suprise, Holly's eyes were welling up with tears - tears he tried to prevent by continuing quickly.

' You're just beautiful, you know,' he told her,' and I - I love you. '

As soon as he'd said it, he wanted to vanish on the spot; he must sound ridiculous. Holly was shocked - he ... loved her? Her? Loved her? Howard saw her eyes widened and assumed the worst. Instead, Holly threw herself into his arms with such force that it was a wonder they didn't both fall off the roof.

Her hands were on his face and her lips met his. He was so suprised that he barely kissed back - even though he shouldn't have been so suprised, since he was the one who'd just confessed his love. Her lips pressed against his and she tasted so sweet and wonderful.

Gently, Howard laid his hands on her shoulders and gently disengaged himself from her.

Holly frowned and reached out, trying to cup his face in her hands again. He shook his head and moved her hands away from his face.

Howard was horrified as he watched tears gather in Holly's eyes.

' But you just said that you loved me! '

' Wait - '

' You can't tell me all that stuff and then push me away! ' she protested, the tears threatening to spill.

' But - '

' For god's sake Howard! ' she exclaimed,' you _just told me _that you love me! You can't make me feel all happy and that, and then shove me away! You can't just play with me like that! Howard, this is - '

Howard suddenly gripped her forearms and looked her in the eye, forcing her to calm down and listen to him,' Holly, be quiet and listen to me! '

She looked back at him, her breathing heavy and her eyes wide.

He loosened his grip on her arms, and his arms slid down to her waist, where he closed them around her and held her,' Holly, sunshine, the _only _reason I broke away is because I have to know how you feel too ... '

Holly breathed a sigh of relief before smiling,' Isn't it obvious? I think you're fantastic. I've liked you since I got here - you're smart, and kind and funny. You're tall, which is good 'cos it makes me feel safe. And you're better looking than you think - even your mustache kinda works in some weird sorta way. And you're all sensible and practical - and I'm not, so that could come in handy. You're all kind and shy and sweet. God, can't you see how I feel, Howard? '

Howard smiled and Holly tilted her head on one side. Her eyes were bright - so trusting - so loving.

' I love ya,' she said,' I love you. '

As Holly kissed him again, he was now fully ready to respond. He kissed her back with more enthusiasm than he'd ever imagined - kissing her like he kissed no-one before her. In fact, the only other person he'd kissed was Vince ... here on this very roof ... ew no, get that out of your head, he told himself.

One his hands slipped under her top and traced the scars on her back lightly. The other was in her hair, and his fingers worked their way through her silky locks of hair.

After what seemed like an age, they broke apart, each with matching smiles and shining eyes.

Holly sighed in contentment and rested her head against Howard's shoulder. His arms were still around her, and they stayed like that until Howard noticed her shivering; her flimsy vest offered very little protection.

' You're cold? ' he asked.

She nodded,' A - a bit. '

He smiled,' C'mon,' he told her,' let's go back inside.'

As the scrambled back towards the window, just before they climbed back downstairs, the Moon started singing softly.

' _She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah_. '

Holly giggled at Howard - who was still wearing her glittery gold hat - as he looked at the moon in shock.

' See,' she said,' I told ya the moon could talk. '

' _She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah. She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah. '_

When they were back inside the attic, Howard took her hand and led back down to the flat, until they were stood in corridor outside the bathroom and the bedrooms.

' Well ... I guess, this is goodnight,' Howard sighed.

Holly nodded and was about to turn in for the night, when she looked up at him,' D'you think maybe ... ' she laughed,' could I stay in your room tonight? '

Howard's eyes widened in shock.

Holly couldn't help but smile at him,' Not, you know - I'm not thinking about going _that _fast. I just ... this is silly ... but I just want to be with _you. _'

Howard smiled shyly,' Yeah. Yeah, c'mon. '

Once in Howard's bedroom, both were quite shy - Howard, of course, was always shy, but Holly was always more forward.

Howard wasn't sure whether he should put some pajamas on. Or should he sleep in his underwear? No, he couldn't do that; he didn't want to scare her off. Then again, she was his girlfriend now. Wasn't she? Had he actually asked her to be his girlfriend? Did it need saying? They'd confessed their love, after all ... and was girlfriend the right word? Wasn't he a bit old to have a girlfriend. But Holly wasn't too old to have a boyfriend ... was he too told for her? Oh God, it was too late to start thinking about this now, wasn't it?

' Howard? You alright? '

Howard snapped out of his trance and smiled at her,' Sorry, sunshine. Just thinking ... '

' You're freaking out, aren't you? ' she asked,' Oh, I'm sorry - this is too fast right? I knew it was daft ... I'll go sleep in my own room. '

' Don't go,' Howard said,' I'm just being stupid ... it's nothing. You know me - when in doubt, Howard Moon freaks out over every little thing. '

Holly reached up and kissed his cheek,' Well don't. Now have you got a t-shirt I can borrow? I don't wanna risk fetching my pajamas and Vince waking up. '

Howard grinned - Holly had sorted out his dilemma. If she was wearing a t-shirt, then his safest bet was to wear the same. Rooting through his draws, he pulled out a loud hawaiian button down shirt and tossed it at her.

Smiling, she unbuttoned her jeans, and Howard blushed, turning around and giving her some privacy. When he turned back around, she was wearing his shirt which was far too long for her, falling halfway down her thighs, with only half of the buttons fastened.

Howard stripped off his trousers - thankful he was wearing modest boxer shorts which were long enough not to leave him feeling embarrassed.

As Holly clambered into Howard's bed, Howard went to follow her. She smirked at him,' Surely you're not leaving that shirt on? ' she asked,' you've been wearing it all day ... '

He nodded,' I'll - I'll put another one on, shall I? '

' Or,' she said, smiling,' you could just ... not. '

Howard decided to do as he was told, and pulled his shirt over his head. When he faced Holly again he was aware of her gaze on him - raking over his legs and taking in his chest.

Holly had to admit that she was suprised at Howard's figure; his legs were quite slim and youthful, his arms were strong, and his chest looked manly and strong.

' Well,' she smiled,' aren't you a sight for sore eyes? I don't know why you're so self-conscious Howard, I really don't. Look at you, you look great. '

Howard didn't answer as he slipped into bed beside her and turned out the light on the bedside table.

' So what were you thinking - or worrying - about? ' Holly asked as they lay side by side.

Howard cleared his throat,' Am I too old for you, Holly? '

Holly laughed,' How old are you, Howard? '

' 35. '

' Right, an' I'm 27. That's only ... um ... 8 years. S'not much, really. And besides - now's not the time to be worrying about whether or not you're right for me,' she said seriously,' we've had the big romantic scene on the roof top, an' we're not going back from there. '

Howard smiled, once again Holly had managed to make his worries sound to trivial and easy to sort out.

He reached out an arm and wrapped it around Holly. She was laying on her side, and nestled in close to him, resting her head against him, and one hand on his bare chest.

' Does this mean we're - ' he started looking down at her,' Are we together now, then? '

To his suprise, she laughed,' You what? You think that we're gonna say we love each other, I'm gonna sleep in your bed, and then that's it? Nah, you're stuck with me now. '

' I think I can live with that,' he shrugged,' Hmmm, imagine introducing you to people "Oh, hello, have you met Holly Noir? My girlfriend?" Is girlfriend the right word? '

' Well partner's a stupid word - that's what you have in business. So it's gotta be girlfriend, hasn't it? ' she asked, her fingers trailing across his chest, absent mindedly making patt

' _At least for now_,' Howard thought,' _until ... until I can call her something bigger. '_

' I love you,' he sighed happily,' I don't know if I mentioned that. '

Holly laughed,' I love you too,' she said, pressing a kiss to his chest, before laying her head there and closing her eyes.

As Howard watched his beloved fall asleep, he grinned dreamily.

Now, everything was perfect.


	14. Morning Gorgeous!

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Holly woke much earlier than she usually did the next day - it was 8AM, and there was an hour before the shop had to be opened. Naboo was probably up already, Howard would be awake very soon, Bollo shortly after, then Vince last.

Holly was laying on her side, her head on Howard's chest and one arm across him, resting on his chest. He had an arm around her and was pinning her to him, holding her tightly.

She felt warm and safe. Happy.

Smiling slightly, she lifted her head from his chest and propped herself up on one elbow, looking at him. Her eyes raked over his face, taking in every little thing.

' Stop staring at me, Holly, it's unnerving. '

Holly smiled when he opened his eyes, and their eyes met,' Morning gorgeous,' she grinned. And how did you know what I was doing, anyway? '

' I've been awake a while,' he told her,' I just didn't want to get up. '

Holly smiled and laid her head on his bare chest again,' You know,' she said,' I think you're amazing. '

Howard smiled, playing with a lock of her jet black hair,' You're not bad yourself . '

' And you know, I don't even mind you messing about with my hair. An' I usually always mind when my hair gets messed up. '

Howard rolled his eyes,' Sometimes, you're so like your brother, it's unbelievable. '

Holly laughed, her fingertips making patterns in his chest, before a sudden thought struck her,' Vince. We've gotta tell Vince. I wonder what he'll say ... '

' He'll be alright, won't he? ' Howard asked with a shrug.

' I dunno,' Holly sighed,' when I was at high school, he used to have one of my guy friends as some sort of informant. Then if he found out that anyone liked me, he'd be in there like a shot, scaring them off. '

' Just looking out for you, I guess,' Howard told her,' high school boys are berks. '

' Seriously Howard, he's so protective - he's always had a not-so-quiet word in the ear of anyone who's shown any interest in me. But he's your best friend too - he's probably not gonna like that. '

' He's a big boy, sunshine, he'll be ok,' Howard told her, though he too was worried.

They lay in the bed a while longer, wrapped around each other.

' I've never been in love before,' Holly told him with a shy sort of smile,' there's been the odd date, and high school fling I guess, but I've never been in love. '

Howard kissed the top of her head,' Then I'm very glad that I'm the one you've ended up with. '

The bedroom door swung open suddenly, and Naboo was in the doorway. Whatever he'd come into the room to tell Howard was forgotten as his eye fell on Holly.

Holly and Howard shared the look of two people who'd been caught red handed, even if they'd actually rather innocently just slept in the same bed.

' Naboo,' Holly said, sitting up,' Um ... '

Naboo smirked, noticing she was wearing one of Howard's shirts, and Howard appeared to be at least _half_ naked,' I knew you two were gonna get together,' he told them.

' Yeah listen,' Holly said quickly,' it's not - i mean - yeah, we are- but don't tell -

' Don't tell Vince because you're worried he won't be happy? ' Naboo asked,' he'll be fine. You knw Vince he can never stay mad for long. And he loves you both ... well, he loves Holly. '

' Hey! I'm his best friend! ' Howard protested.

Naboo shrugged,' Yeah, an' you're kinda my mate too but it doesn't mean that I love you. '

' Did you want something, anyway? ' Howard sighed.

' Oh yeah,' Naboo nodded,' I was just gonna ask if you were getting up today, 'cos it's nearly half past eight, and someone's gotta open the shop. But now I know what was keeping you in bed ... '

' Shove off,' Howard said, shaking his head.

The mischevious shaman grinned and left the room.

' C'mon then gorgeous,' Holly sighed, poking his side,' suppose we'd better get up ... ' she said. Reluctantly, Howard scrambled out of bed and Holly followed.

' I'd better go find some clothes,' she told him with a grin. But when she got to the door, she stopped and turned back to face him,' about Vince ... I think maybe ... maybe you should tell him. '

' Me? '

' Yeah,' nodded Holly,' it's just ... you know him so well, I think it should be you to tell him. '

Howard frowned,' What do you mean, _I _know him so well. You're his sister. '

Holly rolled her eyes,' Yeah, I _know _that. I just meant that since he left school and moved into the Zooniverse with you, and then when I left college and went off all over the place, you've spent far more time with him than I have. You and him have been off on all your adventures - most of which you've yet to tell me, by the way - and you're his best mate. '

Howard looked relucant.

Holly huffed,' Howard, you're telling him and that's final. You're the rational, sensible one, you'll handle it better than I will. '

' But - '

She pouted and looked at him with her big blue eyes, and he knew he couldn't resist. She was just too captivating.

He simply nodded, and she grinned before leaving the room.


	15. Howard? Are You Ill?

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Vince came down for work that morning at 10am, as he aways did - one hour late.

' Hey guys,' he said, sitting in his favourite comfy chair by the window, where he could look out on the street and make a judgement on every person who passed.

Holly looked up from the book she'd been reading - an old _Charlie_ book which Vince had written,' Morning,' she smiled.

Howard nodded at Vince, before looking at Holly. Holly gave him Howard a look with a clear meaning as she nodded her head in Vince's direction. Howard sighed and nodded, so Holly put down her book and slid off the counter.

' Howard? '

' Hmmm, yeah Holly? ' he asked, only just stopping himself from calling her 'sunshine.'

' D'you mind if I go out for a few hours? ' she asked, looking at Vince, who was watching them,' I've been meaning to get some new shoes for ages, an' there's a new little shop opened in town. It looks well cool. '

Howard pretended to be annoyed, although they'd planned this as a way for Howard to be able to talk to Vince, ' I suppose,' he sighed,' although don't be out too long, will you? '

' Cheers Howard,' grinned Holly, grabbing her jacket.

' Can I come too? ' asked Vince hopefully,' me and you haven't been shopping in ages, Hol. '

' You went on Saturday after we closed up here,' pointed out Howard.

' Exactly! ' Vince exclaimed.

' No,' Howard said,' me and you need to work on our next gig at the Velvet onion, little man. '

Vince sighed,' Ok. '

Holly kissed her brother's cheek and winked at howard when Vince wasn't looking, before leaving.

*****

Holly had been gone for over an hour when Howard plucked up the courage to bring up the sensitive subject with his best friend.

Vince was eating a banana when Howard looked across the room at him.

' Vince,' he said carefully,' there's something I wanted to talk to you about.'

Vince looked over at him,' Yeah? ' he asked through a mouthful.

He sighed,' Right, it's a bit difficult really ... '

Vince's eyes widened,' Howard? Are you ill? What is it? Oh god ... how serious? How long've you got left to live? '

' Woah, hold it,' Howard said, holding up a hand to silence Vince, coming around the other side of the counter, and sitting opposite him. Howard sighed, closing his eyes and mustering up the courage - this was going to take lots and lots of courage.

' I'm not ill,' Howard told him,' but I've met someone. I've - I've got a girfriend, Vince. '

' Met someone? ' echoed Vince, a smile crossing his face,' how did you manage to get a girl? A girlfriend! Well good for you, I guess. '

Howard smiled awkwardly,' I've liked her for about 6 weeks and I've recently had the courage to tell her how I feel. The thing is, she's really beautiful and funny and she makes me feel fantastic about myself. '

' Genius,' Vince nodded,' you'll have to introduce me to her sometime ... hang on,' he added with a frown,' when have you even been out to meet this girl? The only time you go out without me is to jazzercise, and I doubt you've met someone there. '

' Yeah, she's not from jazzercise,' Howard said quietly.

' Then how have you had chance to meet someone? ' Vince asked in confusion.

Howard took a deep breath,' Before I tell you, you have to know that I love her - I'm not messing her about, I really care about her. ' He sighed and said,' Vince, it's Holly. '

Vince nodded and Howard waited for him to realise. Vince smiled,' That's - woah, wait! Holly? _Holly? _Holly, my little _sister? '_

Vince stood up quickly, and Howard stood too, immediately regretting telling Vince.

Vince's eyes widened and he was looking at Howard with a mixture of shock and hurt. But now anger - Howard had expected anger.

' You've - you've been seeing my little sister? How long? When? What? H-how? '

Howard cleared his throat,' I told you, I've liked her for a while. Then last night I heard her go out on the roof so I went up there, told her how I felt. She said she felt the same, and - and here we are. '

' But she's my sister,' Vince said, ' and you're my best friend. That's not supposed to happen. '

' I know,' nodded Howard,' but you can't help who you fall for, and I really like her. She's - she's so amazing, Vince. '

Vince paused before asking,' You love her? '

' Course I do,' Howard confirmed,' I love her like I've never loved anyone. '

' And you understand that if you ever hurt her, I'd honestly kill you. ' Vince's tone was deadly serious, and it was at this point that Howard found himself staring at Vince's eyes - so identical to Holly's, and so prone to captivating him.

' I know. '

Vince bit his lip,' I want to be really angry at you, because she's my sister, but I can't do it. If she's happy, and you're happy, then what can I do about it? She's old enough now, I suppose. An' there has to be a moment when she stops being my little sister and starts needing someone else more. '

Howard reached out and laid a hand on Vince's shoulder,' You know, no matter how much I love her, she'll always still be your sister. And she needs someone, it's always going to be you that she wants. She'll always need you. '

Vince nodded,' Thanks Howard. But you - you and her. You're my best mate - what if we start growing apart because you've got a girlfriend. And then the two people I know best don't need me any more. '

' Little man, that's ridiculous,' Howard told him,' it's me and you forever right? Against the yetis, and green men with polos for eyes, and transexual mermen, Bob Fossil ... '

Vince laughed,' Yeah. After all, you're still useless - you're still gonna need some advice, aren't you? '

Vince hugged his friend and for possibly the first time, Howard didn't tell him to get off him.

' Although,' Vince said,' you _do _understand that I might have to take bac my generous stance on this relationship if you two are aways kissing and stuff in front of me. And I've still got to talk to her. '

Howard nodded,' 'Course. '

But deep down, he knew that all was well.


	16. The End

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

The Mighty Boosh

Holly finally reappeared after her shopping trip at nearly 4pm.

When she staggered into the door of the shop with difficultly, she was carrying so many bags that she was almost invisible under them.

Vince grinned when he saw her, and laughed,' Aw, genius! What did you get? There's loads here! '

Howard rolled his eyes,' Holly! You were only going to go out for about an hour, to give us chance to talk; you've been gone 6 hours! '

Holly shrugged,' I know I was just going to give you some space, but I thought whilst I was going out, I might as well actually buy some new shoes. Then I saw a few pairs I liked, then I had to go find some clothes to go with one of the new pairs of shoes. Then I got distracted and bought some other clothes. Then I found a really cool belt, and I had to stop and look in some other shops. '

Howard groaned,' I don't even want to know how much money you've spent. '

Holly waved her hand in an offhand manner,' Who cares? S'not as if you're paying for it. '

_No, _Howard thought, _but I might be one day, and she spends loads!_

Holly dumped the bags on the floor and breathed a sigh of relief for taking the weight off her hands. She looked between Howard and Vince.

' Have you -? ' she asked Howard, looking from he to Vince.

Vince looked up from where he was eagerly searching through Holly's bags. He put down the shoe box he was holding to look at his sister.

' Yeah, I know,' he said,' about you and Howard. '

' And? ' she asked hopefully.

There was a pause, during which Holly thought for a moment he might tell her he wasn't happy with it. Then again, she'd left them here all day and Howard was still alive, so that had to be a good sign.

Then Vince spoke,' You're happy? '

' Course I am,' Holly told him, sparing a glance for Howard,' I love him. '

Vince grinned, ' If you're happy, then I'm happy for you,' he told her.

Holly beamed and threw her arms around her brother,' Oh God, Vince. You're the best. ' Vince hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek before letting go of her.

When he let go of her, Holly went to hug Howard. She covered his lips with her own, kissing him only briefly, aware of Vince's eyes boring into the back of her head. When she pulled away from Howard, he stood leaning against the counter and held her close. His arms were around her waist, her back to his chest.

' This is brilliant,' sighed Holly happily.

As she nestled in Howard's arms, feeling safe and comfy, she knew that now everything was perfect.

She and Howard were together now and nothing could be better.

Then Vince pulled out a pair of shoes which Holly had just bought. He raised his eyebrows as he held up the black leather boots,' Woah, sis, these are a bit kinky, aren't they? '

Holly sighed, avoiding Howard's eyes as she blushed furiously.

Maybe not everything was better then - Vince was still Vince.


	17. Author's Note

Note

Thanks to everyone who's followed this, and read and reviewed this.

I've got a sequel called **When Holly Met Gregg, **which you can find on my profile or in the Mighty Boosh section. You can probably guess which character makes an appearance ...


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